Week 5 Results - Artisans Join CFJs at the top

Claymore Athletic FC 0 v 1 Nil Satis Nisi Optimum

Garth Crooks' Team of the Week 0 v 2 Mega Buck Bandits

Markian United 5 v 2 Cheese Makers

Real Muppets 4 v 2 Stanley and Gracie United

The Cow-Faced Juniors 1 v 1 San Dimas High School

The Wateringhole Society 1 v 3 The Fabulous Artisans

Trusted By Millions 1 v 1 Aardvark Abacus

Wheel Madrid 2 v 1 YTFIB

	Team	P	W	D	L	F	A	Diff	Pts
1	The Cow-Faced Juniors	5	4	1	0	14	8	6	13
2	The Fabulous Artisans	5	4	1	0	10	5	5	13
3	The Wateringhole Society	5	3	0	2	10	11	-1	9
4	Mega Buck Bandits	5	3	0	2	7	8	-1	9
5	Aardvark Abacus	5	2	2	1	10	4	6	8
6	Nil Satis Nisi Optimum	5	2	2	1	4	3	1	8
7	San Dimas High School	5	2	2	1	7	9	-2	8
8	Real Muppets	5	2	1	2	14	12	2	7
9	Markian United	5	2	1	2	11	10	1	7
10	Stanley and Gracie United	5	2	1	2	9	10	-1	7
11	Claymore Athletic FC	5	2	0	3	7	7	0	6
12	YTFIB	5	1	1	3	8	10	-2	4
13	Wheel Madrid	5	1	1	3	5	7	-2	4
14	Garth Crooks' Team of the Week	5	1	1	3	4	7	-3	4
15	Cheese Makers	5	1	0	4	7	12	-5	3
16	Trusted By Millions	5	0	2	3	4	8	-4	2

The CFJs retain top spot but lost their 100% league record with a 1-1 draw against San Dimas. It needed an injury time Gabriel header to grab that draw too after Mikel Merino had glanced me in front after 84 minutes. The Artisans join the Cows on 13 points following their 3-1 win at the Wateringhole. Nick Woltemade nodded Ben ahead in the first half, Jarrod Bowen doubled the lead with a deflected shot 20 minutes into the second half and Eddie Nketiah wrapped it up in injury time.

Mega Bucks are fourth (fourth!) after winning 2-0 at GC TotW. Jaidon Anthony was on target again for Dave and a Nathan Ake clean clinched the points. The Aardvarks are point behind following their 1-1 draw with Trusted. Ollie Watkins opened his account for the season for Ady, lofting over the keeper on 37 minutes, but his team were denied the win by a Rico Henry clean sheet. Beef still looking for that first league win.

Nil Satis are sixth (sixth!) after that 1-0 win over old rivals Claymore. The game was settled by Michael Keane’s 18th minute header. The Muppets climb to eighth but needed help from SGU in their 4-2 win. Maxime Esteve shinned into his own net twice and then Erling Haaland added a late brace with Enzo Fernandez and Trai Hume’s clean replying for Aaron.

In a week short of counters Markian found five to defeat Cheese Makers. Matthew’s team took the lead here too, Raul Jimenez glancing home after three minutes. That was soon levelled by Ismaila Sarr’s easy finish and then Benjamin Sesko notched his first WSFFL goal from close range and Joe Rodon made it 3-1 before the break. Joao Palhinha pulled one back in second half injury time but Ian had a couple of cleans up his sleeve. Wheel Madrid picked up their first win of the campaign, 2-1 against YTFIB. Antoine Semenyo fired a free-kick under the wall to put Julian ahead but the Wheelmen turned it round in two second half minutes thanks to John McGinn and Emi Buendia goals.

Week 4 Results - Four out of four for the CFJs

Aardvark Abacus 1 v 3 Claymore Athletic FC

Cheese Makers 0 v 2 Garth Crooks' Team of the Week

Mega Buck Bandits 1 v 2 The Cow-Faced Juniors  

Nil Satis Nisi Optimum 1 v 2 The Wateringhole Society  

San Dimas High School 3 v 2 Trusted By Millions  

Stanley and Gracie United 2 v 0 Markian United

The Fabulous Artisans 1 v 0 Wheel Madrid

YTFIB 3 v 2 Real Muppets  

	Team	P	W	D	L	F	A	Diff	Pts
1	The Cow-Faced Juniors	4	4	0	0	13	7	6	12
2	The Fabulous Artisans	4	3	1	0	7	4	3	10
3	The Wateringhole Society	4	3	0	1	9	8	1	9
4	Aardvark Abacus	4	2	1	1	9	3	6	7
5	Stanley and Gracie United	4	2	1	1	7	6	1	7
6	San Dimas High School	4	2	1	1	6	8	-2	7
7	Claymore Athletic FC	4	2	0	2	7	6	1	6
8	Mega Buck Bandits	4	2	0	2	5	8	-3	6
9	Nil Satis Nisi Optimum	4	1	2	1	3	3	0	5
10	Real Muppets	4	1	1	2	10	10	0	4
11	YTFIB	4	1	1	2	7	8	-1	4
12	Garth Crooks' Team of the Week	4	1	1	2	4	5	-1	4
13	Markian United	4	1	1	2	6	8	-2	4
14	Cheese Makers	4	1	0	3	5	7	-2	3
15	Wheel Madrid	4	0	1	3	3	6	-3	1
16	Trusted By Millions	4	0	1	3	3	7	-4	1

It wasn’t a dominant performance but the CFJs picked up a fourth straight league win, 2-1 at Mega Bucks. After Jaidon Anthony and Mikkel Damsgaard swapped goals within a minute of each of other it took a Tino Livramento clean to ensure that the Cows keep their perfect league record. The only other unbeaten team are The Artisans who edged out Wheel Madrid 1-0 thanks to a smart header from Jarrod Bowen early in the second half.

The Wateringhole made it three wins out of four with a 2-1 win at Nil Satis. Hugo Ekitike’s opener for Kiran was soon equalised by Dominic Calvert-Lewin’s header and the Society grabbed their winner with a Malick Thiaw clean after 84 minutes. The Aardvarks are down to fourth after losing their unbeaten record with a 3-1 defeat against Claymore. Richarlison steered Ady ahead just before the break but Clive’s defenders turned it round in the second half. First with a Matty Cash rocket and then a header and a clean from the bench by Trevoh Chalobah.

Two teams join the Aardvarks on seven points. SGU are sixth after beating Markian 2-0. Aaron’s scores came from a fantastic first-time finish from Harry Wilson on 40 minutes and then a James Hill clean sheet. San Dimas are seventh on goal difference following their 3-2 win over Trusted. My team finally found their scoring boots with Yankuba Minteh, Anton Stach and a great volley from Tyrick Mitchell all on target and just enough to beat Beef’s side who join Wheel Madrid as the sides still waiting for a league win.

YTFIB got their first win, taking down the champions 3-2. An exciting start here as Neco Willams smashed Julian ahead on two minutes, Erling Haaland equalised on nine minutes only for Ryan Gravenberch to put YTFIB back in front a minute later. Alex Iwobi extended Julian’s lead before the break and though Wilson Isidor pulled one back for the Muppets that was the end of the scoring. There was an also a first win for GC TotW. Bruno Fernandes was marginally onside for the 14th-minute opener and Gabriel Martinelli ended any chance of a Cheese fightback with a clever lob over the keeper in injury time.

Paul Cartmell Memorial Trophy 1st Round Results - Holders through

Aardvark Abacus 4 v 3 The Fabulous Artisans 

Claymore Athletic FC 1 v 0 Stanley and Gracie United 

Garth Crooks' Team of the Week 1 v 1 The Cow-Faced Juniors

Markian United 2 v 2 Real Muppets 

Mega Buck Bandits 0 v 1 The Wateringhole Society

Nil Satis Nisi Optimum 1 v 3 Trusted By Millions 

Wheel Madrid 0 v 2 San Dimas High School

YTFIB 2 v 2 Cheese Makers

Replays

Cheese Makers 0 v 4 YTFIB

Real Muppets 3 v 0 Markian United

The Cow-Faced Juniors 3 v 2 Garth Crooks' Team of the Week

Holders Claymore have made it into the quarter-final hat after scraping past SGU 1-0. Clive’s score came from a Daniel Munoz clean, Aaron hasn’t won a first round cup game for a couple of years now. Last year’s runners-up Markian United will need a second attempt to get through after a 2-2 draw with the Muppets. Two goals in 15 second-half minutes from Erling Haaland had Ryan’s team in control but a stunning strike from Moises Caicedo with five minutes left got Ian back in it and a Maxence Lacroix clean was the equaliser.

The CFJs had started with three wins out of three in the league but were held 1-1 by GC TotW who are still looking for their first win. The Cows went in front straight after halftime courtesy of Viktor Gyokeres who sidefooted in from a pinpoint cross. Ollie’s team were given a lifeline deep in injury time when a penalty decision went their way and Mohamed Salah duly converted. The Aardvarks and the Artisans both went into their tie unbeaten but it’s the Aardvarks who came out with their record intact. After Nick Woltemade headed in a debut goal for Ben it was Ady who took charge through goals from Martin Zubimendi (2 - the first one was a belter), Lucas Bergvall and Micky van de Ven. A coupe of cleans from the Artisans made the score respectable.

Nil Satis also went into their game with an unbeaten league record but went down 3-1 to Trusted. Beef’s team had struggled but the return of Cole Palmer with a goal shows brighter days are ahead. After Fabio Carvalho had made it 2-0 Trusted had a scare when Gabriel Gudmundsson planted a header into his own net but made it 3-1 with a Joachim Andersen clean. Clean sheets from Tyrick Mitchell and Dan Burn saw San Dimas beat Wheel Madrid 2-0. Paul hasn’t seen a lot for his Alexander Isak outlay yet.

Dave has never made the final of this tournament and he won’t this year after going down 1-0 to the Wateringhole. It’s hardly been a happy hunting ground for Kiran either, Kaoru Mitoma’s close range header giving him just his second win in 11 years in the competition. YTFIB were runners-up in this three years ago and had a firm grip on a quarter-final appearance when 2-0 up after an hour through Alex Scott and Antoine Semenyo. Cheese Makers tend not to go quietly these days though and forced a replay with cleans from Tyrone Mings and Kieran Trippier.

In the replays, there were comfortable replay wins for YTFIB, 4-0 winners at a surprisingly limp Cheese, and for the Muppets in an Erling Haaland-led 3-0 victory over Markian. The CFJ-s have the longest run of making it through the first round. A clean sheet inspired 3-2 comeback win against GC TotW stretched that run to four seasons.

Week 3 Results - CFJs the last 100% team standing

Aardvark Abacus 0 v 0 Nil Satis Nisi Optimum 

Claymore Athletic FC 1 v 2 San Dimas High School 

Garth Crooks' Team of the Week 1 v 3 Stanley and Gracie United 

Markian United 3 v 2 YTFIB

Real Muppets 1 v 2 The Fabulous Artisans 

The Cow-Faced Juniors 3 v 2 Cheese Makers 

Trusted By Millions 1 v 2 Mega Buck Bandits 

Wheel Madrid 1 v 2 The Wateringhole Society

	Team	P	W	D	L	F	A	Diff	Pts
1	The Cow-Faced Juniors	3	3	0	0	11	6	5	9
2	Aardvark Abacus	3	2	1	0	8	0	8	7
3	The Fabulous Artisans	3	2	1	0	6	4	2	7
4	The Wateringhole Society	3	2	0	1	7	7	0	6
5	Mega Buck Bandits	3	2	0	1	4	6	-2	6
6	Nil Satis Nisi Optimum	3	1	2	0	2	1	1	5
7	Real Muppets	3	1	1	1	8	7	1	4
8	Markian United	3	1	1	1	6	6	0	4
9	Stanley and Gracie United	3	1	1	1	5	6	-1	4
10	San Dimas High School	3	1	1	1	3	6	-3	4
11	Cheese Makers	3	1	0	2	5	5	0	3
12	Claymore Athletic FC	3	1	0	2	4	5	-1	3
13	YTFIB	3	0	1	2	4	6	-2	1
14	Wheel Madrid	3	0	1	2	3	5	-2	1
15	Garth Crooks' Team of the Week	3	0	1	2	2	5	-3	1
16	Trusted By Millions	3	0	1	2	1	4	-3	1

The CFJs are our only team with three wins out of three. They trailed twice to Cheese Makers but a late Brajan Gruda goal and a Tino Livramento clean gave the Cows a 3-2 win. Previous table-toppers the Aardvarks are second after being held 0-0 by Nil Satis. Paul’s team are sixth and unbeaten this season.

The Artisans beat the Muppets 2-1 to inflict the first defeat on the champions. Erling Haaland put Ryan ahead, a stunning Marc Guehi strike brought Ben level and Jarrad Bowen won it six minutes from the end. The Wateringhole are fourth after beating Wheels 2-1. Kiran needed cleans from Maio Gusto and Marc Cucurella after Paul looked to have won it with Callum Wilson’s injury time header.

There was another good win for Mega Bucks, 2-1 over Trusted. Enzo Le Fee’s penalty was Dave’s winner after Beto had equalised Evanilson’s opener. Has Beef broken some mirrors while walking under a ladder or something? Markian got their first win, 3-2 over YTFIB thanks to a saved penalty from Robin Roefs plus goals from Ismaila Sarr and Lucas Paqueta. Julian hasn’t had a lot of luck with opponents so far.

SGU got their first win, 3-1 at GC TotW. Kieran Dewsbury-Hall and Enzo Fernandez scored within a minute of each other to take the game away from Ollie. There was a first win for San Dimas too, 2-1 at Claymore. I needed cleans from Dan Burn and Marcos Senesi to get the job done.