FA Cup 1st Round Draw

Aardvark Abacus v Claymore Athletic FC

Cheese Makers v Stanley and Gracie United

Mega Buck Bandits v The Cow-Faced Juniors

Nil Satis Nisi Optimum v Wheel Madrid

Real Muppets v Garth Crooks' Team of the Week

San Dimas High School v Markian United

The Wateringhole Society v The Fabulous Artisans

YTFIB v Trusted By Millions

Mrs Co-ordinator did the draw which pitches the current league leading Artisans against the Cup holders and second-placed Wateringhole. Games kick-off most likely on Fridau 9 January.

Week 12 Results - Wateringhole cut lead to five points

Aardvark Abacus 2 v 2 The Fabulous Artisans 

Claymore Athletic FC 2 v 4 The Wateringhole Society 

Garth Crooks' Team of the Week 2 v 0 Markian United

Mega Buck Bandits 1 v 4 Stanley and Gracie United 

Nil Satis Nisi Optimum 5 v 2 Cheese Makers

San Dimas High School 4 v 0 YTFIB 

The Cow-Faced Juniors 0 v 4 Real Muppets

Trusted By Millions 2 v 1 Wheel Madrid 

	Team	P	W	D	L	F	A	Diff	Pts
1	The Fabulous Artisans	12	9	2	1	28	15	13	29
2	The Wateringhole Society	12	8	0	4	30	20	10	24
3	Stanley and Gracie United	12	7	2	3	27	19	8	23
4	Real Muppets	12	7	1	4	34	19	15	22
5	The Cow-Faced Juniors	12	6	2	4	29	22	7	20
6	Aardvark Abacus	12	5	4	3	24	17	7	19
7	Claymore Athletic FC	12	6	1	5	21	19	2	19
8	Markian United	12	5	3	4	21	18	3	18
9	San Dimas High School	12	4	4	4	17	23	-6	16
10	Nil Satis Nisi Optimum	12	4	3	5	18	26	-8	15
11	Mega Buck Bandits	12	5	0	7	14	27	-13	15
12	Trusted By Millions	12	3	4	5	22	18	4	13
13	Cheese Makers	12	4	1	7	19	29	-10	13
14	Garth Crooks' Team of the Week	12	3	3	6	13	18	-5	12
15	YTFIB	12	2	2	8	14	29	-15	8
16	Wheel Madrid	12	1	2	9	12	24	-12	5

he Artisans failed to win in the league for just the third time this season but a 2-2 draw at the Aardvarks keeps Ben five points clear. There was another Richarlison goal to put Ady ahead on 20 minutes but the Artisans turned it round thanks to Jarrod Bowen slide tackling his side level on 20 minutes and Marc Guehi heading home with three minutes left. A Wesley Fofana clean gave Ady a draw but he’s now ten points off the pace. The gap is now five points to the Wateringhole Society after Kiran’s team put Claymore away 4-2.One apiece at the break, Hugo Ekitike scored twice in three minutes to make it 3-1 and Mason Mount added another just after the hour. Clive could only reply with a Lenny Yoro clean.

SGU have popped up in third place after beating Mega Bucks 4-1. Dave took the lead here too, Bruno Guimaraes scoring direct from a corner*, before Harry Wilson added another goal to his highlight reel to level seven minutes before the break. Aaron’s team finished strongly with goals from Kiernan Dewsbury-Hall, Dominik Szoboszlai and Zian Flemming from the spot all in the last ten minutes and injury time. The Muppets are fourth after blowing the CFJs away 4-0. Goalless until 25 minutes from time Phil Foden guided in a header for the opener and Ryan followed up with cleans from James Tarkowski, Adrien Truffert and Lewis Hall.

GC TotW pulled away from the bottom two with a 2-0 win over Markian. Bruno Fernandes was Ollie’s star man again getting both goals, the first half goal was a bit messy, the second half effort came from the spot. San Dimas are ninth after their best performance this season, a 4-0 win over YTFIB. Josko Gvardiol headed me in front in the first half, Burn and Gvardiol bagged earlyish clean sheets before Anton Stach smashed in to make it four.

Nil Satis also turned in their best showing of the season to see off Cheese Makers 5-2. Matthew wasn’t helped by Nikola Milenkovic heading into his own net after two minutes. It was 2-2 six minutes into the second half after Anthony Gordon and Bryan Mbeumo had scored for the Cheese and Jean-Ricner Bellegarde for NSNO. Dominic Calvert-Lewin put Paul back in front from the spot and cleans from Vitaly Mykolenko and Jake O’Brien sent the St Domingo crowd home happy. Trusted picked up their third win of the season, edging Wheel Madrid 2-1. Leandro Trossard’s strike had Beef in control only for Emi Buendia to level after a proper old-fashioned melee five minutes into injury time and have Paul W counting his sixth point of the season. It wasn’t to be, Rico Henry’s clean from the bench was Beef’s winner.

* When did these goals from corners start being called Olympicos? The answer is 1924 would you believe https://www.goal.com/en-us/news/what-is-olimpico-goal-which-players-scored-them/1bnn18qlv06b91pb2ahoduf87t but it does seem to have gained a bit more traction over here in the last five years.

Cup semi-final results

Paul Cartmell Memorial Trophy 

Aardvark Abacus 3 v 3 The Wateringhole Society 

Trusted By Millions 0 v 1 The Cow-Faced Juniors 

The Cow-Faced Juniors are through to their third PCMT Final after a fortunate win over Trusted. This one was heading for a replay until a wayward-looking shot screwed in off the foot of Trusted defender Nordi Mukiele. The Cows have won their previous two finals in this competition in 2012/13 and the following season.

The Aardvark/Wateringhole game will need a replay after an entertaining three-all draw. Ollie Watkins scored twice for Ady, John Paul van Hecke also netted two for Kiran whose team looked to have won through when Bukayo Saka’s shot in injury time had just enough behind it to cross the line. Ben White’s clean forced a replay for the Aardvarks.

Replay

The Wateringhole Society 4 v 3 Aardvark Abacus 

Kiran through to his first PCMT Final. A win would complete the WSFFL Grand Slam.

Charity Shield Semi-Finals

Garth Crooks' Team of the Week 3 v 1 Stanley and Gracie United 

Mega Buck Bandits 1 v 3 Cheese Makers

Three late goals put Ollie into his first WSFFL final. In-form SGU looked in control when Pedro Neto squeezed in at the far post early in the second half, but the game trend round with two Garths goals in a minute. Jack Grealish’s shot from 20 yards deflected in and was soon followed by a brilliant diving header from Cristian Romero. Romero’s half-speed, shinned overhead kick in injury time made the game safe.

There was also a late turnaround from their soon-to-be final opponents, Cheese Makers. Matthew’s team trailed 1-0 to Mega Bucks with five minutes left but they turned it round thanks to an Anthony Gordon penalty plus clean sheets from David Raya and Nikola Milenkovic. Matthew will look to go one batter than his defeat in the final last season.

Week 11 Results - Artisans' lead stretches to seven

Garth Crooks' Team of the Week 1 v 1 Nil Satis Nisi Optimum

Markian United 1 v 0 The Cow-Faced Juniors 

Real Muppets 2 v 1 Trusted By Millions 

Stanley and Gracie United 5 v 1 Cheese Makers

The Fabulous Artisans 4 v 2 San Dimas High School

The Wateringhole Society 4 v 0 Aardvark Abacus 

Wheel Madrid 1 v 3 Claymore Athletic FC

YTFIB 0 v 3 Mega Buck Bandits

	Team	P	W	D	L	F	A	Diff	Pts
1	The Fabulous Artisans	11	9	1	1	26	13	13	28
2	The Wateringhole Society	11	7	0	4	26	18	8	21
3	The Cow-Faced Juniors	11	6	2	3	29	18	11	20
4	Stanley and Gracie United	11	6	2	3	23	18	5	20
5	Real Muppets	11	6	1	4	30	19	11	19
6	Claymore Athletic FC	11	6	1	4	19	15	4	19
7	Aardvark Abacus	11	5	3	3	22	15	7	18
8	Markian United	11	5	3	3	21	16	5	18
9	Mega Buck Bandits	11	5	0	6	13	23	-10	15
10	Cheese Makers	11	4	1	6	17	24	-7	13
11	San Dimas High School	11	3	4	4	13	23	-10	13
12	Nil Satis Nisi Optimum	11	3	3	5	13	24	-11	12
13	Trusted By Millions	11	2	4	5	20	17	3	10
14	Garth Crooks' Team of the Week	11	2	3	6	11	18	-7	9
15	YTFIB	11	2	2	7	14	25	-11	8
16	Wheel Madrid	11	1	2	8	11	22	-11	5

The Artisans stretched their lead to seven points after seeing off San Dimas 4-2. A slew of clean sheets got the job done for Ben after Mikel Merino had headed me level on the hour. The Wateringhole Society jump to second after beating the Aardvarks 4-0, a goal in each half from Malick Thiaw for Kiran.

The CFJs drop to third after a single goal loss to Markian. An excellent strike from Former Cow Mohammed Kudus was Ian’s winner. SGU’s rise continues after a 5-1 win over Cheese Makers. Harry Wilson’s smart thinking and technique set Aaron’s team on their way.

Two goals from Phil Foden, one in the first minute, one in second half injury time, saw the Muppets home 2-1 against Trusted. Claymore are up to sixth after a 3-1 win at Wheel Madrid. Some good news for Paul W here as Alexander Isak scored his first goal for the club. The less good news was Igor Thiago scoring twice for Clive in the last ten minutes to set up the win.

Mega Bucks swept YTFIB aside 3-0, a rare Kenny Tete goal inside four minutes put Dave on the road to victory. It finished 1-1 between GC TotW and Nil Satis. Dominic Calvert-Lewin with a goal for Paul S, Ibrahima Konate’s clean was Ollie’s equaliser.

Week 10 Results - Artisans stay clear

Aardvark Abacus 6 v 2 Wheel Madrid

Cheese Makers 1 v 1 YTFIB 

Claymore Athletic FC 2 v 1 Real Muppets

Mega Buck Bandits 0 v 1 The Fabulous Artisans 

Nil Satis Nisi Optimum 2 v 3 Stanley and Gracie United 

San Dimas High School 0 v 3 The Wateringhole Society 

The Cow-Faced Juniors 6 v 1 Garth Crooks' Team of the Week

Trusted By Millions 1 v 1 Markian United

	Team	P	W	D	L	F	A	Diff	Pts
1	The Fabulous Artisans	10	8	1	1	22	11	11	25
2	The Cow-Faced Juniors	10	6	2	2	29	17	12	20
3	Aardvark Abacus	10	5	3	2	22	11	11	18
4	The Wateringhole Society	10	6	0	4	22	18	4	18
5	Stanley and Gracie United	10	5	2	3	18	17	1	17
6	Real Muppets	10	5	1	4	28	18	10	16
7	Claymore Athletic FC	10	5	1	4	16	14	2	16
8	Markian United	10	4	3	3	20	16	4	15
9	Cheese Makers	10	4	1	5	16	19	-3	13
10	San Dimas High School	10	3	4	3	11	19	-8	13
11	Mega Buck Bandits	10	4	0	6	10	23	-13	12
12	Nil Satis Nisi Optimum	10	3	2	5	12	23	-11	11
13	Trusted By Millions	10	2	4	4	19	15	4	10
14	Garth Crooks' Team of the Week	10	2	2	6	10	17	-7	8
15	YTFIB	10	2	2	6	14	22	-8	8
16	Wheel Madrid	10	1	2	7	10	19	-9	5

A third of the league season done then. Ben will certainly be happy with his early work, his five point lead intact after a 1-0 win at Mega Bucks. It took an injury time saved penalty by Bart Verbruggen to get the Artisans the points but there must be a cliche about winning when you’re not playing well that fits here. The CFJs certainly are playing well and beat GC TotW 6-1 to keep second place. There was an Eberechi Eze masterclass that earned him a hat-trick and also goals from Yeremy Pino and Danny Welbeck before Ollie’s team replied through Morgan Gibbs-White. Alex Jimenez’ clean for the Cows finished the scoring.

The Aardvarks also hit six this weekend and go third. Ady’s team turned a two-goal deficit against Wheel Madrid into a 6-2 win. Paul W’s team sat pretty at half-time thanks to a brace from Callum Wilson but Ady must have got stuck into his team at the interval to spark the turnaround. Morgan Rogers scored twice, Richarlison scored the goal of the game with a lob from distance and Marcus Tavernier added another from the spot. Dean Henderson and Ian Maatsen added cleans. The Wateringhole Society are fourth after sweeping San Dimas aside 3-0. My team hung on until the hour but Harvey Barnes struck twice for Kiran and Marc Cucurella added a clean sheet.

SGU are fifth, eight points off the top, after beating Nil Satis 3-2. Kiernan Dewsbury-Hall fired in from the edge of the area to put Aaron ahead on the half-hour and a diving Pedro Neto made it two before the break. Enzo Fernandez added the third two minutes from time and SGU will be grateful he did as Paul S hit back with cleans from Michael Keane and Jake O’Brien but ultimately fell short. The Muppets and Claymore are joined on 16 points after Clive’s team beat Ryan’s 2-1 this week. Igor Thiago opened the scoring for Claymore from the spot on 29 minutes, Daniel Munoz doubled the lead on 63. Thiago missed another penalty late on but it didn’t prove costly as the Muppets could only find a James Tarkowski clean in reply.

Trusted and Markian played out a 1-1 draw that doesn’t really help either of them where the title race is concerned. Leandro Trossard’s deflected shot on the turn came close to winning it for Beef only for Ryan Sessegnon’s clean to level it for Ian. The other 1-1 draw was between Cheese Makers and YTFIB. Raul Jimenez steered in an excellent cross with six minutes left but Matthew’s team failed to close the game out and Julian equalised with a Nico Williams clean.