Week 9 Results

Bassett Allsorts 3 v 0 Mega Buck Bandits
Claymore Athletic FC 0 v 7 Trusted By Millions
Final Fantasy XI 2 v 3 The Fabulous Artisans
Real Muppets 0 v 5 The Dead Parrots
San Dimas High School 0 v 0 Fred West Landscape Gardening XI
The Cow-Faced Juniors 3 v 1 Aardvark Abacus
York’s Returning Glory 2 v 2 Nil Satis Nisi Optimum
You Know Your Boston Rock FC 1 v 0 Athletico Phoenix

Another draw for Fred means Boston Rock go back to the top spot. Sheriff's team only managed one goal, an Andy Carroll header, against a determined Athletico Phoenix but it was enough for him to leapfrog Fred after the Gardeners spent five weeks at number one. Fred was held to a goalless draw at San Dimas, playing in front of the biggest crowd of the week for the first time in two seasons, but a dour 0-0 won't see too many of the 75,000+ rushing back.

If it's goals you want then Trusted were the team to watch this week. I've had a go at Beef's plodding start to the season more than once but this is more of what we expect. Claymore had no answer to doubles from Torres and Park in particular and suffered his biggest league defeat. (Although Trusted did batter Clive's team 9-2 in the Cup last season so he's got previous). Goals galore at the Muppets too but no one would have been expecting all five to be scored by the Parrots. Dean's team had gone quiet after a good start but Kevin Davies led the onslaught with a brace, Alan Hutton curled a superb goal from outside the box and two cleans completed the rout.

The Parrots are up to sixth, one place behind the CFJs who added the Aardvarks to their list of scalps this season. Frederic Piquionne put Chris ahead but when Asamoah Gyan levelled on 86 minutes it looked like Ady had rescued a point but it wasn't to be. A Martin Petrov breakaway goal and then Nedum Onuoha with a clean inflicted a fourth Aardvark defeat of the season. It's not great form that Ady's taking into his PCMT semi-final. The Aardvark's opponents in midweek are the Artisans who finally got a return on their Mario Balotelli money. The £27m striker scored two quick goals in the first half and Marc Albrighton made it three against Final Fantasy by half-time. Ceri hit back in the second half through Morten Gamst Pedersen's free-kick before Balotelli saw red. Cameron Jerome immediately reduced the deficit further but Ceri couldn't make the extra man pay. Ben will appeal against Balotelli's suspension and hope he can make the semi-final.

Final Fantasy are three points adrift at the bottom now after the Allsorts won their second game of the season. Ben left it late to beat Mega Bucks but Roman Pavlyuchenko's spectacular volley on 87 minutes was quickly followed by a Brede Hangeland header and a Tim Krul clean. Dave's Bandits have the league's leakiest defence at the moment. York's have made a better fist of it so far this season and came from 2-0 down to grab a point against Nil Satis. Paul was ahead through yet another Tim Cahill header and a Seamus Coleman strike but those goals were cancelled out by Gretar Steinsson and an Anton Ferdinand clean.