Charity Shield Roll of Honour

Winners

2 - San Dimas High School
2 - The Cow-Faced Juniors

2 - Trusted By Millions

2 - Athletico Phoenix
1 - Aardvark Abacus

1 - Mega Buck Bandits
1 - Nil Satis Nisi Optimum

1 - The Fabulous Artisans

1 - The Dead Parrots


Finals

2023/24 Trusted By Millions 2 Nil Satis Nisi Optimum 0

2022/23 San Dimas High School 6 Claymore Athletic FC 1

2021/22 Mega Buck Bandits 2 Aardvark Abacus 0

2020/21 San Dimas High School 4 The Wateringhole Society 1

2019/20 The Fabulous Artisans 3 Athletico Phoenix 2
2018/19 Aardvark Abacus 4 YTFIB 1
2017/18 The Cow-Faced Juniors 1 Nil Satis Nisi Optimum 0 (after 4-4 and 1-1 draws)
2016/17 Nil Satis Nisi Optimum 2 Real Muppets 1
2015/16 The Cow-Faced Juniors 1 The Fabulous Artisans 0
2014/15 Athletico Phoenix 4 The Dead Parrots 3
2013/14 Trusted By Millions 2 Claymore Athletic FC 1
2012/13 The Dead Parrots 2 Athletico Phoenix 1
2011/12 Athletico Phoenix 4 Mega Buck Bandits 0

Paul Cartmell Memorial Trophy Final

San Dimas High School 1
Walker [c]

v

The Cow-Faced Juniors 3
Bale 61, 73, 84

(one cancelled clean)

At Wembley.    Att: 90,000

San Dimas: Al-Habsi; Distin, Lichaj, Fabio, Walker; Milner, Kacaniklic, Dorrans, De Guzman; Odemwingie, Pogrebnyak       
Subs: Mignolet; Naughton; Ben Arfa; Lukaku

The CFJs: Cesar; Cameron, Turner, Chico, Riether; Sigurdsson, Lennon, Michu, Bale; Suarez, Holt    Subs: Mannone; Hill; Wright-Phillips; Fortune

Gareth Bale has been one of the league's star performers over the last couple of seasons and his hat-trick delivered a first WSFFL trophy to the CFJs. The first big move of the match came before kick-off. San Dimas selected Pavel Pogrebnyak to partner Peter Odemwingie and left Jon Walters out after a barren run. Theo Walcott had already been ruled out for the Saints after travel problems left him unable to get to the match. The first half was quiet. A combination of poor weather and two sides not wanting to give much away led to poor fare for the capacity Wembley crowd.

The game burst to life just after the hour mark. A defensive slip let in Bale who rounded the keeper and steered home. That setback seemed to rock San Dimas and Chris' team took advantage. Bale was given too much space and found the corner of the net on 73 minutes and completed his hat-trick 11 minutes later when slamming home from close range. Kyle Walker got a consolation clean for San Dimas but it's Chris that will be booking the open top bus and driving up and down Drove Road.

How they got there

Semi-finals

San Dimas High School 6 You Know Your Boston Rock 0
The Cow-Faced Juniors 4 The Fabulous Artisans 0 (after 3-3 draw)


Quarter-finals

San Dimas High School 2 Trusted By Millions 0
The Cow-Faced Juniors 3 Fred West Landscape Gardening XI 1
The Fabulous Artisans 1 Claymore Athletic 0

You Know Your Boston Rock FC 5 Final Fantasy XI 2 (after 1-1 draw)

First round

Claymore Athletic FC 2 The Cheese Makers 1
Final Fantasy XI 2 Athletico Phoenix
Fred West Landscape Gardening XI 5 Nil Satis Nisi Optimum 1 (after 2-2 draw)
San Dimas High School 1 Real Muppets 0
The Cow-Faced Juniors 7 YTFIB 2
The Fabulous Artisans 3 Mega Buck Bandits 0 (after 3-3 draw)
Trusted By Millions 3 The Dead Parrots 1
You Know Your Boston Rock FC 1 Aardvark Abacus 0

FA Cup first round draw

Holders Claymore face a tricky trip to the Stade de Fromage.

Athletico Phoenix v Trusted By Millions
Fred West LG XI v Nil Satis Nisi Optimum
Real Muppets v You Know Your Boston Rock FC
San Dimas High School v Aardvark Abacus
The Cheese Makers v Claymore Athletic FC
The Cow-Faced Juniors v Mega Buck Bandits
The Fabulous Artisans v The Dead Parrots
YTFIB v Final Fantasy

The Muppets and Boston Rock have won the competition seven times between them but one of them will be disappointed before the decorations come down.

Games to be played w/c 5 January.

Charity Shield Final

Athletico Phoenix 1
Evra 16

v

The Dead Parrots 2
Snodgrass 23
Barry 90

(two cancelled cleans)

Athletico Phoenix: Lindegaard; Vertonghen, Evra, Zabaleta, Lowton; Cazorla, Rosicky, Maloney, Morrison; van Persie, Suso       
Subs: Tremmel; Mertersacker; Oxlade-Chamberlain; Rosenberg

The Dead Parrots: Hart; Boyce, Williamson, Nelsen, Riise; Taarabt, Duff, Barry, Routledge; Snodgrass, Lambert               
Subs: Pantilimon; Harte; Obertan; Sh.Ameobi

At St James' Park Newcastle. Att: 50,180

The Charity Shield will be making a metaphorical trip 'down under' after Dean's Parrots lifted the first pot of the season.

The opening goal came on 16 minutes and went the way of the Phoenix. Patrice Evra isn't the tallest by any stretch of the imagination but he glanced a header in from a corner. The lead lasted seven minutes. Robert Snodgrass is making a name for himself as a set-piece specialist and his free-kick curled over the wall and into the corner of the Phoenix goal.

Chances were few and far between in the second half and Robin van Persie came close to putting Brian's team back in front when his volley struck the bar on 66 minutes. It seemed as though the game was drifting towards a replay when, in stoppage time, the Parrots found a controversial winner. Record-signing Gareth Barry rose highest in the penalty area to power home a header but the Phoenix defence were convinced that he'd unfairly climbed over the back one of their rearguard. The referee saw no infringement and it was ultimately the goal that took the trophy to Australia.

How they got there

Semi-finals

Athletico Phoenix 4 The Cheese Makers 1
The Dead Parrots 4 YTFIB 0

Quarter-finals

Athletico Phoenix 3 Aardvark Abacus 2
The Cheese Makers 4 Mega Buck Bandits 1
The Dead Parrots 2 Real Muppets 1
YTFIB 2 Nil Satis Nisi Optimum 0

Week 14 Results

Claymore take another turn on top.

Aardvark Abacus 3 v 0 You Know Your Boston Rock FC
Athletico Phoenix 6 v 1 YTFIB
Claymore Athletic FC 4 v 2 The Fabulous Artisans
Final Fantasy XI 2 v 0 The Cow-Faced Juniors
Nil Satis Nisi Optimum 0 v 2 San Dimas High School
The Cheese Makers 1 v 1 Real Muppets
The Dead Parrots 2 v 1 Fred West Landscape Gardening XI
Trusted By Millions 1 v 3 Mega Buck Bandits

	Team	P	W	D	L	F	A	Diff	Pts
1	Claymore Athletic FC	14	11	1	2	38	21	17	34
2	The Cow-Faced Juniors	14	10	2	2	41	24	17	32
3	Final Fantasy XI	14	8	1	5	27	18	9	25
4	You Know Your Boston Rock FC	14	7	2	5	37	23	14	23
5	Mega Buck Bandits	14	7	2	5	26	20	6	23
6	Real Muppets	14	6	5	3	25	22	3	23
7	Trusted By Millions	14	7	1	6	29	25	4	22
8	Athletico Phoenix	14	6	2	6	31	25	6	20
9	Aardvark Abacus	14	6	1	7	25	22	3	19
10	The Cheese Makers	14	5	3	6	24	26	-2	18
11	The Fabulous Artisans	14	5	3	6	24	26	-2	18
12	The Dead Parrots	14	4	4	6	21	27	-6	16
13	YTFIB	14	3	4	7	17	31	-14	13
14	San Dimas High School	14	4	1	9	23	42	-19	13
15	Nil Satis Nisi Optimum	14	3	1	10	18	35	-17	10
16	Fred West Landscape Gardening XI	14	2	3	9	16	35	-19	9

Claymore are our Christmas number one after ousting the CFJs from top spot. Clive's team were 2-2 after the Artisans' Christian Benteke equalised on 51 minutes but Wayne Rooney and a Goran Popov clean gave The Swordsmen the win. While that was going on the CFJs were suffering only their second defeat of the season, 2-0 to the CFJs. Demba Ba and Yaya Toure got the goals for Ceri who is now 'best of the rest', seven points off second place.

Boston Rock relinquished third after losing 3-0 to old rivals the Aardvarks. Two early goals from Lukas Podolski and Anthony Pilkington set up the win for Ady and Adam Le Fondre finished it off. Did anybody think both Okus teams would be in the top five after 14 weeks? Mega Bucks are in that fifth place (two points behind the missus) after beating Trusted 3-1. A Ryan Shawcross own goal set Dave on the way in this one.

The Muppets and The Cheese Makers finished 1-1 and the teams stay in that middle tranche. Javi Garcia's goal for Matthew equalised by a first of the season from Fraizer Campbell. The Phoenix warmed up for the Charity Shield final with a 6-1 drubbing of YTFIB. Santi Cazorla's hat-trick doubled his tally for the season. Robin van Persie got the opener to take his tally to ten.

Brian's opponents in that Final this weekend are the Dead Parrots. Dean's team warmed up with a win too. Adel Taarabt hasn't always looked like a £10m player but he got both goals and Fred could only reply with a Hugo Lloris clean. The Cromwell Street rebuilding programme may take longer than expected. The basement battle for 14th place went to San Dimas with a 2-0 win over Nil Satis. Theo Walcott broke the deadlock 10 minutes from time.

Week 13 Results

The top two starting to run away with this.

Athletico Phoenix 2 v 2 The Cheese Makers
Fred West Landscape Gardening XI 2 v 5 Nil Satis Nisi Optimum
Mega Buck Bandits 3 v 2 Final Fantasy XI
San Dimas High School 3 v 1 Trusted By Millions
The Cow-Faced Juniors 4 v 1 Real Muppets
The Fabulous Artisans 3 v 3 The Dead Parrots
You Know Your Boston Rock FC 1 v 4 Claymore Athletic FC
YTFIB 1 v 0 Aardvark Abacus

	Team	P	W	D	L	F	A	Diff	Pts
1	The Cow-Faced Juniors	13	10	2	1	41	22	19	32
2	Claymore Athletic FC	13	10	1	2	34	19	15	31
3	You Know Your Boston Rock FC	13	7	2	4	37	20	17	23
4	Final Fantasy XI	13	7	1	5	25	18	7	22
5	Trusted By Millions	13	7	1	5	28	22	6	22
6	Real Muppets	13	6	4	3	24	21	3	22
7	Mega Buck Bandits	13	6	2	5	23	19	4	20
8	The Fabulous Artisans	13	5	3	5	22	22	0	18
9	Athletico Phoenix	13	5	2	6	25	24	1	17
10	The Cheese Makers	13	5	2	6	23	25	-2	17
11	Aardvark Abacus	13	5	1	7	22	22	0	16
12	The Dead Parrots	13	3	4	6	19	26	-7	13
13	YTFIB	13	3	4	6	16	25	-9	13
14	Nil Satis Nisi Optimum	13	3	1	9	18	33	-15	10
15	San Dimas High School	13	3	1	9	21	42	-21	10
16	Fred West Landscape Gardening XI	13	2	3	8	15	33	-18	9

Week 12 Results

It's as you were with the top six all winning and bottom five all losing.

Aardvark Abacus 3 v 1 Athletico Phoenix
Claymore Athletic FC 2 v 1 YTFIB
Final Fantasy XI 4 v 0 San Dimas High School
Nil Satis Nisi Optimum 0 v 2 The Fabulous Artisans
Real Muppets 2 v 1 Mega Buck Bandits
The Cheese Makers 3 v 4 The Cow-Faced Juniors
The Dead Parrots 0 v 4 You Know Your Boston Rock FC
Trusted By Millions 3 v 0 Fred West Landscape Gardening XI

	Team	P	W	D	L	F	A	Diff	Pts
1	The Cow-Faced Juniors	12	9	2	1	37	21	16	29
2	Claymore Athletic FC	12	9	1	2	30	18	12	28
3	You Know Your Boston Rock FC	12	7	2	3	36	16	20	23
4	Trusted By Millions	12	7	1	4	27	19	8	22
5	Final Fantasy XI	12	7	1	4	23	15	8	22
6	Real Muppets	12	6	4	2	23	17	6	22
7	Mega Buck Bandits	12	5	2	5	20	17	3	17
8	The Fabulous Artisans	12	5	2	5	19	19	0	17
9	Athletico Phoenix	12	5	1	6	23	22	1	16
10	Aardvark Abacus	12	5	1	6	22	21	1	16
11	The Cheese Makers	12	5	1	6	21	23	-2	16
12	The Dead Parrots	12	3	3	6	16	23	-7	12
13	YTFIB	12	2	4	6	15	25	-10	10
14	Fred West Landscape Gardening XI	12	2	3	7	13	28	-15	9
15	Nil Satis Nisi Optimum	12	2	1	9	13	31	-18	7
16	San Dimas High School	12	2	1	9	18	41	-23	7

The league is taking on the appearance of a Neapolitan ice cream this week as it divides into three layers. The top six teams are the refreshing strawberry flavour, the middle five are the take it or leave it  depending what mood you're in vanilla, and then we have the brown chocalatey stodgey mess that is the bottom five.

Top of the strawberry layer are the CFJs who keep powering on. Remember the PCMT semi-final when Chris roared into a 3-0 half-time lead but Ben pegged him back for a draw? The reverse happened this week when the Cheese Makers stormed into a three-goal lead in 33 minutes. Sebastian Bassong, Juan Mata and Marouane Fellaini are among Matthew's best performers this season and were all on target. Chris needed all his dodging skills to turn things round and get a result. Carlton Cole and two late on from Michu levelled the game and Geoff Cameron's clean won it, Spare a thought for Matthew who would have beaten anyone else this week. Claymore are managing to keep up with the CFJs but were unconvincing against YTFIB. Clive hasn't got the best out of Wayne Rooney this season but a penalty and close range finish from the England striker proved enough with Julian only finding a Danny Simpson clean in reply.

The Dead Parrots/Boston Rock game was uneventful into Jermain Defoe struck twice in five minutes for Sheriff with around a quarter of an hour left. Defoe has joined Michu at the head of the scoring charts on nine league goals. Chris Smalling and Steven Caulker's clean finished the game off. It was clean sheets all the way for Trusted against Fred. Robert Huth, Phil Jones and Ryan Shawcross keeping Beef just about in touch with the title race.

Final Fantasy took advantage of a San Dimas team with a serious Cup semi-final hangover. Brett Holman smashed Ceri in front on eight minutes, Demba Ba added a penalty five minutes later and Ba struck again, mopping up a rebound, on 21 minutes. I managed not to embarrass myself further until Jose Enrique's clean made it four. The Muppets are the last of our top layer after a come from behind victory over Mega Bucks. Sean Morrison battered a header in on 23 minutes to give Dave the lead on 23 minutes but Carlos Tevez equalised from the spot two minutes before the break. Jose Reina hasn't been at his best this season but got the winning clean for Ryan.

The Artisans had only managed one in the last six league matches but had too much for Nil Satis this week. Cleans from Asmir Begovic and Martin Skrtel proving the difference an getting Ben moving the right way again. Only San Dimas are keeping Paul from being the sloppy chocolate dregs. Have the Aardvarks turned the corner? It's three wins out of four for Ady after beating the Phoenix. Adam Le Fondre opened the scoring with a header on 19 minutes but Robin van Persie equalised 15 minutes later after beating the offside trap. Anthony Pilkington and Craig Gardner were both given too much room by the Phoenix defence on the run up to the break and their fiercely struck shots were too got to handle. It wasn't RvP's best day with a 'goal' being missed by the linesman and an open goal miss in the second half which could have thrown Brian a lifeline.

Paul Cartmell Memorial Trophy semi-final replay result

No respite for Ben this time and the holders are out.

The Cow-Faced Juniors 4 v 0 The Fabulous Artisans

Paul Cartmell Memorial Trophy semi-final results

The multiple winners fall at the semi-final stage, the holders live to fight on.

San Dimas High School 6 v 0 You Know Your Boston Rock FC
The Fabulous Artisans 3 v 3 The Cow-Faced Juniors

I usually start these round-ups with the holders but I think there's a good reason not to this week. Boston Rock love this competition almost as much as I love a cold beer on a warm Christmas morning so part of me is sorry to inflict such a grievous defeat on him. But the other, bigger part is thrilled to be through to the final in such style. Theo Walcott got free in the first minute and his curled shot deflected past Ben Foster for a perfect start for me and there was a great end to the half when Romelu Lukaku smashed home a loose ball. The next goal was always going to be crucial and it came from an ex-Rocker in James Milner who rifled into the top corner from 25 yards to start repaying his transfer fee. Jon Walters header and two clean sheets were the coup de grace.

The holders staged an extraordinary fightback against the league leaders to earn a replay this weekend. The CFJs had raced into a three goal in little more than 15 minutes. Aaron Lennon and Michu scoring from close range and then Gareth Bale's free-kick deceived Asmir Begovic. It was Mario Balotelli's first goal of the season on 69 minutes that set the comeback in motion. Three minutes later a CFJs clearance clattered into Bale's face and flew into his own net and then, with ten minutes left, Christian Benteke powered home a header which means they'll try again at the Drove Stadium.

Charity Shield semi-final results

Athletico get a chance to keep the Trophy in Kingham.

The Cheese Makers 1 v 4 Athletico Phoenix
The Dead Parrots 4 v 0 YTFIB

The holders will get the chance to defend their trophy in next month's final. It took Robin van Persie just 32 seconds to score via a deflection and get the Phoenix off and running but the Cheese Makers battled back into the game and levelled on 28 minutes when Marouane Fellaini threaded a shot into the corner from 20 yards. The game then failed to ignite and it was clean sheets from Patrice Evra, Pablo Zabaleta and a first from Matthew Lowton that saw Brian through.

The other tie was one-sided with YTFIB suffering from travel sickness on the long haul Down Under. All four goals came in the first half. Wayne Routledge bundled in the opener on 11 minutes, Rickie Lambert got his sixth of the season on 32, Routledge added a second seven minutes later before Robert Snodgrass's free-kick on the stroke of half-time somehow eluded Boaz Myhill to complete the scoring. It was all a bit pipe and slippers for Dean after that.

The teams meet in the final on 22 December. I think I might have booked St James' Park for the game.

Week 11 Results

CFJ's lead cut to a point.

Aardvark Abacus 3 v 2 The Cheese Makers
Athletico Phoenix 0 v 1 Claymore Athletic FC
Fred West Landscape Gardening XI 1 v 0 Final Fantasy XI
Mega Buck Bandits 3 v 3 The Cow-Faced Juniors
San Dimas High School 0 v 4 Real Muppets
The Fabulous Artisans 1 v 3 Trusted By Millions
You Know Your Boston Rock FC 3 v 1 Nil Satis Nisi Optimum
YTFIB 1 v 1 The Dead Parrots

	Team	P	W	D	L	F	A	Diff	Pts
1	The Cow-Faced Juniors	11	8	2	1	33	18	15	26
2	Claymore Athletic FC	11	8	1	2	28	17	11	25
3	You Know Your Boston Rock FC	11	6	2	3	32	16	16	20
4	Trusted By Millions	11	6	1	4	24	19	5	19
5	Real Muppets	11	5	4	2	21	16	5	19
6	Final Fantasy XI	11	6	1	4	19	15	4	19
7	Mega Buck Bandits	11	5	2	4	19	15	4	17
8	Athletico Phoenix	11	5	1	5	22	19	3	16
9	The Cheese Makers	11	5	1	5	18	19	-1	16
10	The Fabulous Artisans	11	4	2	5	17	19	-2	14
11	Aardvark Abacus	11	4	1	6	19	20	-1	13
12	The Dead Parrots	11	3	3	5	16	19	-3	12
13	YTFIB	11	2	4	5	14	23	-9	10
14	Fred West Landscape Gardening XI	11	2	3	6	13	25	-12	9
15	Nil Satis Nisi Optimum	11	2	1	8	13	29	-16	7
16	San Dimas High School	11	2	1	8	18	37	-19	7

A late fightback keeps the CFJs top. Chris trailed 3-1 to the Bandits before two cleans saved a point. Claymore closed in after a single goal win at the Phoenix. Jonny Evans got the winner for the Swordsmen.

Boston Rock up to third after beating Nil Satis. Two more for Jermain Defoe and even Andy Carroll got one for Sheriff. (Not sure he meant it though!) Trusted beat the struggling Artisans 3-1 to go fourth, Stephane Sessegnon on target again which is good news for Beef.

The Muppets are going the right way too. They took advantage of the leaky San Dimas defence with Ali Al-Habsi spooning one into his own net. 'Curse of the Commentator' struck Final Fantasy who lost by a clean sheet to Nil to Fred who are off the bottom following the win.

The Aardvarks edged the Cheese Makers with two cleans after Sebastian Bassong appeared to have won the game for Matthew in the 90th minute. The Parrots and YTFIB played out a 1-1 draw in their Charity Shield semi-final rehearsal.

Week 10 results

The CFJs and Claymore are still racking up the goals and are looking like the teams to catch this season.

Claymore Athletic FC 4 v 3 Aardvark Abacus
Final Fantasy XI 2 v 1 The Fabulous Artisans
Nil Satis Nisi Optimum 2 v 2 YTFIB
Real Muppets 2 v 2 Fred West Landscape Gardening XI
The Cheese Makers 0 v 1 Mega Buck Bandits
The Cow-Faced Juniors 5 v 4 San Dimas High School
The Dead Parrots 2 v 2 Athletico Phoenix
Trusted By Millions 1 v 0 You Know Your Boston Rock FC

	Team	P	W	D	L	F	A	Diff	Pts
1	The Cow-Faced Juniors	10	8	1	1	30	15	15	25
2	Claymore Athletic FC	10	7	1	2	27	17	10	22
3	Final Fantasy XI	10	6	1	3	19	14	5	19
4	You Know Your Boston Rock FC	10	5	2	3	29	15	14	17
5	Athletico Phoenix	10	5	1	4	22	18	4	16
6	Mega Buck Bandits	10	5	1	4	16	12	4	16
7	Trusted By Millions	10	5	1	4	21	18	3	16
8	Real Muppets	10	4	4	2	17	16	1	16
9	The Cheese Makers	10	5	1	4	16	16	0	16
10	The Fabulous Artisans	10	4	2	4	16	16	0	14
11	The Dead Parrots	10	3	2	5	15	18	-3	11
12	Aardvark Abacus	10	3	1	6	16	18	-2	10
13	YTFIB	10	2	3	5	13	22	-9	9
14	Nil Satis Nisi Optimum	10	2	1	7	12	26	-14	7
15	San Dimas High School	10	2	1	7	18	33	-15	7
16	Fred West Landscape Gardening XI	10	1	3	6	12	25	-13	6

Chris stays three points clear after winning a ding-dong battle with San Dimas. My team led twice in the game, an excellently worked set-piece from Jon Walters on 13 minutes and then a Peter Odemwingie header early in the second half after Luis Suarez had equalised. The game was blown open in 13 minutes when Suarez, Michu, Gareth Bale and Mladen Petric put Chris 5-2 up and even though Jonathan de Guzman and Theo Walcott scored late on it's another three points in the bank for the CFJs. Claymore also had to come from behind to beat the Aardvarks and keep on Chris' coat-tails. Emmanuel Adebayor tapped in from close range on ten minutes to open his account for the season and then got himself sent off for a bad tackle soon afterwards. Despite this Ady doubled his advantage before the break through Lukas Podolski's fourth of the season. Olivier Giroud pulled one back on the stroke of half time and a dodgy penalty award allowed Sergio Aguero to level from the spot. An excellent glanced header from Anthony Pilkington had Ady in front again but another from Aguero and a Gael Clichy clean saw Clive come out on top.

Is it time to take Final Fantasy seriously? We're a third of the way through the season and Ceri lies third after a win over the Artisans. Junior Hoilett gave Ben the lead early in the second half but Jose Enrique got the equaliser and then Demba Ba found the winner deep in injury time. Ben's dropped to tenth and may have to focus his attention on defending the PCMT. Boston Rock lost ground with defeat at Trusted. Stephane Sessegnon hasn't looked anything like the player he was at the start of last season but he struck a superb winner from outside the box to keep Beef going the right way.

The Phoenix missed a chance to climb a place when being held at the Parrots. Rickie Lambert is looking like a £10m player and put Dean ahead with a close-range header but Brian was level a minute when his BFG Per Mertesacker scored a neck-muscle stretching header of his own. santi Cazorla slid in on the hour to put the Firebirds ahead but a Joe Hart clean grabbed a point for the Parrots. Mega Bucks aren't used to being in sixth place but that's where we find Dave after a win at the Cheese Makers. Matthew's chances of going third were damaged on the half-hour when Brede Hangeland saw red for a two-footed tackle and his stretched defence gave to much room to Steven Fletcher to slot home the winner.

Two 2-2s to finish the report with. Fred was two to the good at half-time at the Muppets with goals from midfielders Eden Hazard and David Silva but how Ryan is pleased to have Carols Tevez back in the fold. The Argentinian got both for his team, one from the spot, to share the spoils and keep Fred at the foot of the table. YTFIB and Nil Satis played out a draw too. Steven Naismith was most switched on in the box to stab home on ten minutes but Jason Puncheon and Joey O'Brien scored either side of half-time to put Julian ahead. The equaliser cam seven minutes from time when Anton Ferdinand stuck out a leg and steered a cross into his own net.

Cup semi-final draws

How do the last four shape up...

Paul Cartmell Memorial Trophy semi-final draw

San Dimas High School v You Know Your Boston Rock FC
The Fabulous Artisans v The Cow-Faced Juniors

Ben's holders have a tough game against our current league leaders and if I'm going to complete the clean sweep of WSFFL's major trophies I need to beat the man who's won it most of all.

Charity Shield semi-final draw

The Cheese Makers v Athletico Phoenix
The Dead Parrots v YTFIB

The holders here won't fancy a trip to the improving Cheese Makers while one of Julian or Dean will be in the final.

Week 9 Results

Chris starts a third spell on top.

Aardvark Abacus 1 v 0 The Dead Parrots
Athletico Phoenix 1 v 2 Nil Satis Nisi Optimum
Claymore Athletic FC 1 v 3 The Cheese Makers
Fred West Landscape Gardening XI 1 v 4 The Cow-Faced Juniors
San Dimas High School 1 v 5 Mega Buck Bandits
The Fabulous Artisans 3 v 0 Real Muppets
You Know Your Boston Rock FC 5 v 2 Final Fantasy XI
YTFIB 2 v 2 Trusted By Millions

	Team	P	W	D	L	F	A	Diff	Pts
1	The Cow-Faced Juniors	9	7	1	1	25	11	14	22
2	Claymore Athletic FC	9	6	1	2	23	14	9	19
3	You Know Your Boston Rock FC	9	5	2	2	29	14	15	17
4	Final Fantasy XI	9	5	1	3	17	13	4	16
5	The Cheese Makers	9	5	1	3	16	15	1	16
6	Athletico Phoenix	9	5	0	4	20	16	4	15
7	Real Muppets	9	4	3	2	15	14	1	15
8	The Fabulous Artisans	9	4	2	3	15	14	1	14
9	Mega Buck Bandits	9	4	1	4	15	12	3	13
10	Trusted By Millions	9	4	1	4	20	18	2	13
11	Aardvark Abacus	9	3	1	5	13	14	-1	10
12	The Dead Parrots	9	3	1	5	13	16	-3	10
13	YTFIB	9	2	2	5	11	20	-9	8
14	San Dimas High School	9	2	1	6	14	28	-14	7
15	Nil Satis Nisi Optimum	9	2	0	7	10	24	-14	6
16	Fred West Landscape Gardening XI	9	1	2	6	10	23	-13	5

The CFJs knocked Fred out of the PCMT last week and victory over the same team put Chris top. he could even afford to give Fred a start when the ball cannoned in off Ron Vlaar before Luis Suarez (with the aid of a push) levelled ten minutes later. Cleans from Cameron, Turner and Shorey gave the CFJs a comfortable win and leave the Gardeners at the bottom of the table. Claymore took the lead against the Cheese Makers after some fancy footwork from Sergio Aguero but Matthew's team fought back to take the win. Marouane Fellaini has been in great form lately and equalised with 14 minutes left. Cleans from Wilkinson and Bassong completed the victory while Clive will be cursing not bringing Olivier Giroud on earlier.

A stunning first half performance from Boston Rock steered them to victory over Final Fantasy. Headers from John Terry and Steven Caulker in the space of a minute blew the game open and Kevin Nolan and a Gary Caldwell own goal made it four by the break. Nathan Dyer added a fifth in the second half before a Mark Schwarzer saved penalty and a Kaspars Gorkss clean reduced the deficit. Athletico Phoenix have lost ground after succumbing to Nil Satis. Brian's team were ahead on the half hour with a close range James Morrison header but he'll be upset after the man he pinpointed as the danger, Nikica Jelavic, eluded his defence to equalise late on. Robin van Persie hit the bar twice but it was Chris Gunter who scored the winner for Paul with a clean.

No voodoo needed for the Artisans this week who strolled to a win over the Muppets. Arouna Kone and Adam Johnson both scored in the two minutes before the break and there was no real response from Ryan's team and an Asmir Begovic clean rounded off the scoring for Ben. I must have run over a black cat or not saluted a magpie or something as Mega Bucks became the latest to produce their best game against San Dimas. My team were ahead on 40 minutes through an Alex Kacaniklic header but the second half was all Dave's. Charlie Adam got his first goal of the season, Sean Morrison got a clean on debut, Maicon got his first WSFFL clean and John Ruddy and George McCartney picked up cleans too.

The Aardvarks win a game! The Aardvarks win a game! It wasn't a classic, a close range Lukas Podolski goal was all it took for Ady's team to beat the Dead Parrots but it's a first win since week three and there will be sighs of relief all round the Aldi Arena.  Trusted came from two down to grab a draw at YTFIB. Dimitar Berbatov is proving a great signing for Julian and scored twice taking his tally to five this season. Edin Dzeko struck with two minutes to go to drag Trusted back into it and a James Tomkins clean earned Beef a point.