Cup quarter-final results

Paul Cartmell Memorial Trophy

Aardvark Abacus 2 v 1 Athletico Phoenix
Claymore Athletic FC 5 v 2 San Dimas High School
Fred West Landscape Gardening XI 5 v 2 The Fabulous Artisans
The Cow-Faced Juniors 3 v 1 Cheese Makers

My two year reign as PCMT holder came to a shuddering halt at Claymore. Sergio Aguero gave Clive the lead twice in the first half hour (his second was a beaut) but Dejan Lovren and Romelu Lukaku headers had everything level five minutes into the second half. My defence gave Ross Barkley far too much room on 76 minutes and he made no mistake, Claymore held on this time and added two clean sheets into the bargain. It was also 5-2 for Fred over the Artisans. The Gardeners were two up in six minutes through Wilfried Bony and Eden Hazard and despite an Alfie Mawson own goal and Roberto Firmino on target for Ben, Fred was always one step ahead and Bony, Jermain Defoe and Emre Can added second half goals to make things safe.

Alexis Sanchez notched a brace for the CFJs which proved the difference against Cheese Makers. Those goals for Chris were either side of a Vincent Janssen penalty for Matthew while Daryl Janmaat added the clean to make it 3-1. A clean was the decider for Ady against Athletico. Two great goals had lit up this match - a magnificent Gaston Ramirez solo effort for Ady’s team cancelled out by Diego Costa curling in form long range for Brian. Daley Blind’s clean was the winner for the Aardvarks.

Charity Shield 

FCK2 2 v 3 Trusted By Millions
Mega Buck Bandits 0 v 4 Nil Satis Nisi Optimum
Real Muppets 2 v 1 Wheel Madrid
The Wateringhole Society 2 v 2 YTFIB

Replay

YTFIB 2 v 1 The Wateringhole Society

Trusted, the only previous winners in the field, KO’d FCK2 after being two down. James McArthur got both of Kevin’s goals with his head but three cleans from bed’s men saw his side home. The league-leading Muppets are through too. They fell behind to Wheel Madrid, a power header from Joel Matip, but a rare Stewart Downing goal and a rarer Calum Chambers clean turned things in Ryan’s favour. Nil Satis cruised past Mega Bucks 4-0. A brave Ahmed Musa finish at the start of the second half set Paul up and three cleans finished the job.

YTFIB and TWS have only won three times between them this season so little surprise this one ended in a draw. Two late goals from Ilkay Gundogan (whose signing went a bit under the radar with Julian grabbing Zlatan and the transfer headlines) looked to have won it but cleans from Victor Valdes and Michael Keane have given Kiran a second bite of the cherry this weekend.

The replay went the way of Julian. Zlatan finding his form after a quiet time and getting both the YTFIB goals before Jason Denayer could reply with a clean.

Week Eight Results

Fred wins the top of the table battle to go er… top.

Aardvark Abacus 2 v 0 The Fabulous Artisans 

Athletico Phoenix 1 v 3 Fred West Landscape Gardening XI 

Cheese Makers 0 v 0 Wheel Madrid 

Claymore Athletic FC 2 v 3 Nil Satis Nisi Optimum 

FCK2 0 v 2 Mega Buck Bandits 

The Cow-Faced Juniors 0 v 1 Trusted By Millions

The Wateringhole Society 0 v 1 Real Muppets

YTFIB 1 v 4 San Dimas High School

	Team	P	W	D	L	F	A	Diff	Pts
1	Fred West Landscape Gardening XI	8	6	0	2	23	15	8	18
2	Real Muppets	8	6	0	2	17	14	3	18
3	Athletico Phoenix	8	5	0	3	18	12	6	15
4	Wheel Madrid	8	4	2	2	15	10	5	14
5	Trusted By Millions	8	4	2	2	13	8	5	14
6	Cheese Makers	8	4	1	3	14	13	1	13
7	Aardvark Abacus	8	4	1	3	11	12	-1	13
8	The Cow-Faced Juniors	8	4	0	4	18	12	6	12
9	San Dimas High School	8	3	2	3	17	13	4	11
10	Claymore Athletic FC	8	3	1	4	18	16	2	10
11	Mega Buck Bandits	8	3	1	4	16	15	1	10
12	Nil Satis Nisi Optimum	8	3	1	4	12	14	-2	10
13	The Fabulous Artisans	8	2	3	3	10	12	-2	9
14	YTFIB	8	2	1	5	14	25	-11	7
15	FCK2	8	1	2	5	7	15	-8	5
16	The Wateringhole Society	8	1	1	6	6	23	-17	4

Match of the Week

Too early for this to have a real title bearing but early league supremacy was at stake between Athletico and the Gardeners,

After a tight start to the game a mistake at the back after 27 minutes let in Nathan Redmond to fire the Phoenix ahead. Chances were at a premium and it took until after the hour for the next score. Eden Hazard made space for himself in the box and found the far corner to level the game. Fred kicked on from there and two cleans through Cesar Azpilicueta and a first for Alfie Mawson gave him all three points. 

Elsewhere in the League

Athletics’s defeat drops them to third and the Muppets climb to second after a 1-0 win over the Wateringhole Society. It was a much better performance from Kiran’s team but he was undone by a superb move finished off by Sadio Mane for the only goal of the game in Ryan’s favour. The Cheese Makers and Wheels are nicely placed in the top half at this stage of the season but a goalless draw means they both lose ground.

Trusted appear to be back in business after a 1-0 win at the CFJs. Gary Cahill was the beneficiary of a loose ball in the box and slammed in after 21 minutes in a game where defences were on top. In mid-table the Aardvarks left it very late to beat the Artisans. Winston Reid shot through a crowd with just eight seconds left in injury time but still had enough time to add a clean and double Ady’s advantage. San Dimas needed a host of clean sheets to beat YTFIB. Yannick Bolasie opened the scoring for me just before the hour but a superb half-volley from Christian Fuchs had Julian level with ten minutes left. Three clean sheets, including one from goalkeeping debutant Lee Grant, put me out of sight.

We’ve got this far and haven’t mentioned Claymore yet. They lost again. To Nil Satis this week. Paul’s team did it through two excellent Xherdan Shaqiri strikes and a first from Ahmed Musa. Mega Bucks are up to 11th after beating struggling FCK2. The happy, dancing feet from Phillipe Coutinho saw him open the scoring and Jose (C)Holebas got a clean to make the points certain.

Week Seven Results

With the Muppets losing it’s Athletico who take a turn at the top.

Claymore Athletic FC 1 v 4 The Cow-Faced Juniors

Fred West Landscape Gardening XI 4 v 2 YTFIB 

Mega Buck Bandits 4 v 0 The Wateringhole Society

Nil Satis Nisi Optimum 1 v 4 Athletico Phoenix

Real Muppets 0 v 2 Trusted By Millions

San Dimas High School 3 v 4 Cheese Makers

The Fabulous Artisans 0 v 0 FCK2

Wheel Madrid 3 v 0 Aardvark Abacus

	Team	P	W	D	L	F	A	Diff	Pts
1	Athletico Phoenix	7	5	0	2	17	9	8	15
2	Fred West Landscape Gardening XI	7	5	0	2	20	14	6	15
3	Real Muppets	7	5	0	2	16	14	2	15
4	Wheel Madrid	7	4	1	2	15	10	5	13
5	The Cow-Faced Juniors	7	4	0	3	18	11	7	12
6	Cheese Makers	7	4	0	3	14	13	1	12
7	Trusted By Millions	7	3	2	2	12	8	4	11
8	Claymore Athletic FC	7	3	1	3	16	13	3	10
9	Aardvark Abacus	7	3	1	3	9	12	-3	10
10	The Fabulous Artisans	7	2	3	2	10	10	0	9
11	San Dimas High School	7	2	2	3	13	12	1	8
12	Mega Buck Bandits	7	2	1	4	14	15	-1	7
13	Nil Satis Nisi Optimum	7	2	1	4	9	12	-3	7
14	YTFIB	7	2	1	4	13	21	-8	7
15	FCK2	7	1	2	4	7	13	-6	5
16	The Wateringhole Society	7	1	1	5	6	22	-16	4

Match of the Week

After three straight wins and 11 goals in these matches the Muppets faithful were looking forward to their team extending their fine run of form against Trusted. It didn’t work out like that though. Kevin De Bruyne’s return didn’t spark the Muppets into the creative force that took them to the top and the Belgian even had a penalty saved before the break. The catalyst for Trusted’s win came with Granit Xhaka’s sending off with 20 minutes left. Ten minutes later Victor Moses finished off a fine move to put the away side ahead and they completed their first win in five games when Gary Cahill’s clean made it 2-0 and cost the Muppets top spot.

Elsewhere in the league

The Phoenix take over at the head of affairs thanks to an unlikely source. We only had three saved penalties in the whole of last season, Maarten Stekelenburg saved two for Brian’s team against Nil Satis this week.Added to Diego Costa and Nathan Redmond slamming home opportunities that fell to them in the box it was a comfortable victory. The Gardeners are up to second placebo had to come from behind against YTFIB.  Julian has done some sort of magic trick turning Joe Allen into a goal machine and the Welshman’s brace had his side 2-1 up with two minutes to go. Dele Alli poked in to level things and cleans from Azpilicueta and Courtois gave all the points to Fred.

Wheel Madrid are two points off the top after late goals beat the Aardvarks. Ady came close to taking the lead when Alvaro Negredo almost headed into his own net but it was headers at the right end that gave Paul the win. Nolito on 72 minutes and Callum Wilson 14 minutes later with the goals. Claymore only lost four games in the whole of last season, they’ve lost three out of seven are a heavy reverse to the CFJs. Excellent strikes from Sigurdsson and oil had the Howells two up and Clive’s team didn’t help themselves with an Aguero penalty miss. Sam Vokes did pull one back from the spot but Nacer Chadli restored the two goal advantage from close range to lift his team to fifth.

If it’s goals you want then Tesco Car Park Stadium was the place to be this weekend. San Dimas hosted Cheese Makers and my team ended on the wrong end of a seven-goal thriller. Theo Walcott scored twice  to get me 2-1 ahead before the break but it was Junior Stanislas’ second for Matthew that was the decider. If it’s goals you want then the Artisans FCK2 game was one to miss. The most notable moment being Christian Benteke’s awful penalty attempt. Mega Bucks won the basement battle against The Wateringhole Society thanks to two goals from Charlie Austin and a screamer by Jose Holebas (or is it Cholevas). That’s Kiran’s third 4-0 defeat this season.