Sunday 8 July 2018

Remember the name!

After 16 years with the club Wayne Rooney's Claymore Athletic career has come to an end. Swordsmen boss Clive pays tribute to the striker...

The commentary which accompanied Wayne Rooney’s audacious winning goal against Real Muppets (Arsenal) in October 2002 will stand the test of time, a piece of audio inscribed into English footballing folklore.

But here’s the rub. Lovely soundbite though it was, Claymore Athletic fans did not need telling, they already knew all about the buccaneering Blue charging his way through the Club’s Academy, having signed from Everton some six months earlier for the sum of £500,000.  Which is arguably, the best signing in WSFFL history (cue interesting debate)?

Indeed, Clive Tyldesley, the man responsible for describing Rooney’s sensational strike, all the more aesthetically glorious for clipping the crossbar after defeating the Muppets number one goalkeeper on its way into the net, admitted as much last year.

Just a few months before Tyldesley implored the nation to lodge Rooney’s name in its collective consciousness as the 16-year-old gleefully sped off, leaping into the air in exultation, the ITV commentator had been ordered to do the exact same thing by a season-ticket holding Blue several months earlier.

It was an open secret that Claymore had something very special in Rooney, a footballer of preternatural majesty and incalculable potential. The sublime way Rooney cushioned Thomas Gravesen’s long forward pass, turned for goal and sent his precision strike beyond the Muppets' ‘keeper, merely let the cat out of the bag once and for all.

On that mid-October day, Ryan Moore (Arsene Wenger) stood in the tight confines of the player’s tunnel at ‘Chippenham Park’, taking refuge from an early-evening sun and speaking about the teenager who had just reduced Real Muppets' promising early season form to rubble.

The Frenchman Swindonian puffed out his cheeks and smiled ruefully.

“He’s supposed to be 16,” sighed Moore. A football man to the core, the Muppets manager could not suppress his admiration for what he had just witnessed. Nor was he inclined to.

"At that age, Rooney is already a complete footballer,” said Moore. “The guy can play. He's the best English under-20 I have seen since I came here (in 1994).

“He can play people in, he's clever and a natural, built like a Gascoigne with his low centre of gravity. And he can dribble – I like strikers who can dribble."

The strike also marked out Rooney as an individual with the inherent confidence – and footballing arrogance, perhaps – to strut his stuff on the biggest stage and against the strongest opposition, a trait which possibly further explains why Moore instinctively drew parallels between the Claymore player and Gascoigne.

Gascoigne, though, was 21 when he won his first England cap. Rooney was representing his country within four months of his first Claymore Athletic FC goal. Rooney was utterly fearless that day. He possessed strength of mind and of body beyond his years, effortlessly withstanding the physicality of top-flight football and craving responsibility, sufficiently comfortable in his own skin to repeatedly demand the ball from more seasoned teammates.

When Rooney impudently came to a standstill and placed his studs on top of the ball, then his hands on his hips, while West Bromwich Albion defender Darren Moore watched from a safe distance, it provided a picture which will forever exist in the mind’s eye of those who witnessed it.

More significantly, Moore’s reluctance to engage with Rooney spoke of how the teenager was inspiring respect and terror in his opponents in equal measure.

The Claymore youngster was already being granted a split-second extra on the ball, a yard of space more, simply because he was Wayne Rooney. Some wonderful footballers have taken years to earn such privileges. Cristiano Ronaldo, arguably the best of the lot in today’s game, was roughly three years at Manchester United before defenders chose standing off the Portuguese as their weapon of choice in a one-on-one duel, eschewing an earlier preference for trying to clump the wiry winger into anonymity.

Yet, not every doubter had been entirely won over. There was plenty questioning England manager Sven-Goran Eriksson’s decision to select Rooney for a critical European Championship qualifying match against Turkey in April 2003, when the player had only two caps, both from the bench.  For every quizzical eyebrow raised around the country, there was a chuckle of incredulity emanating from Chippenham. How could anybody still have any reservations about this boy?

It was perhaps when he advanced and threaded a beautifully disguised pass for Claymore team mate Michael Owen that the entire nation truly cottoned on. England won 2-0. When Rooney opted out of the international game he did so as his country’s record goalscorer and with more caps than any other Englishman bar goalkeeper Peter Shilton.

He is Claymore Athletic FC’s all-time top goal scorer with 147.  He notched a very creditable 26 goals in the 2011/12 season.  His trophy haul and individual records (five time WSFFL League winner and twice FA Cup victor, the pinnacle of his achievements being when he picked up the 2012 “£500k Player of the Season” award) stand as testament to his longevity and enduring excellence.
“A winning goal at ‘Chippenham Park’ is a special moment,” said Rooney. “To play for Claymore Athletic FC is a huge deal for me and to score a goal in the WSFFL – especially if it is a winning goal – it does not get much better.”

Last season he hit seven goals, including a 48-minute hat-trick – capped by a stunning strike from his own half – which lit up Chippenham Park and propelled Claymore to an uplifting and valuable 6-1 victory over Mega Buck Bandits.  Rooney’s penchant for the spectacular really is innate. Only a handful of players the world over would have tried to score in comparable circumstances.  That there was nothing on Rooney’s mind other than drilling the ball 58 yards into the back of the net after the goalkeeper’s clearance is enough in itself to set him apart from a mass of his contemporaries.
Wayne Rooney is still box office, no doubt about it. That counts for a lot in the US where he is going.

“Remember the name!” - how can Blues forget?

We wish him well.


Copyright evertonfc.com

Thursday 5 July 2018

2018/19 Fixture List


2018/19 WSFFL Fixture List*

League Week 1: W/C 11 August 2018
Aardvark Abacus v Nil Satis Nisi Optimum
Athletico Phoenix v Markian United
Cheese Makers v Real Muppets
Mega Buck Bandits v Wheel Madrid
San Dimas High School v Trusted By Millions
The Fabulous Artisans v Claymore Athletic FC
The Wateringhole Society v Fred West Landscape Gardening XI
YTFIB v The Cow-Faced Juniors


League Week 2: W/C 18 August 2018
Claymore Athletic FC v The Cow-Faced Juniors
Fred West Landscape Gardening XI v YTFIB
Markian United v Cheese Makers
Nil Satis Nisi Optimum v The Wateringhole Society
Real Muppets v Mega Buck Bandits
The Fabulous Artisans v San Dimas High School
Trusted By Millions v Athletico Phoenix
Wheel Madrid v Aardvark Abacus


League Week 3: W/C 25 August 2018
Aardvark Abacus v Real Muppets
Athletico Phoenix v The Fabulous Artisans
Cheese Makers v Trusted By Millions
Mega Buck Bandits v Markian United
San Dimas High School v Claymore Athletic FC
The Cow-Faced Juniors v Fred West Landscape Gardening XI
The Wateringhole Society v Wheel Madrid
YTFIB v Nil Satis Nisi Optimum


League Week 4: W/C 1 September 2018
Claymore Athletic FC v Fred West Landscape Gardening XI
Markian United v Aardvark Abacus
Nil Satis Nisi Optimum v The Cow-Faced Juniors
Real Muppets v The Wateringhole Society
San Dimas High School v Athletico Phoenix
The Fabulous Artisans v Cheese Makers
Trusted By Millions v Mega Buck Bandits
Wheel Madrid v YTFIB


W/C 15 September: Paul Cartmell Memorial Cup First Round


League Week 5: W/C 22 September 2018
Aardvark Abacus v Trusted By Millions
Athletico Phoenix v Claymore Athletic FC
Cheese Makers v San Dimas High School
Fred West Landscape Gardening XI v Nil Satis Nisi Optimum
Mega Buck Bandits v The Fabulous Artisans
The Cow-Faced Juniors v Wheel Madrid
The Wateringhole Society v Markian United
YTFIB v Real Muppets


League Week 6: W/C 29 September 2018
Athletico Phoenix v Cheese Makers
Claymore Athletic FC v Nil Satis Nisi Optimum
Markian United v YTFIB
Real Muppets v The Cow-Faced Juniors
San Dimas High School v Mega Buck Bandits
The Fabulous Artisans v Aardvark Abacus
Trusted By Millions v The Wateringhole Society
Wheel Madrid v Fred West Landscape Gardening XI


League Week 7: W/C 6 October 2018
Aardvark Abacus v San Dimas High School
Cheese Makers v Claymore Athletic FC
Fred West Landscape Gardening XI v Real Muppets
Mega Buck Bandits v Athletico Phoenix
Nil Satis Nisi Optimum v Wheel Madrid
The Cow-Faced Juniors v Markian United
The Wateringhole Society v The Fabulous Artisans
YTFIB v Trusted By Millions


League Week 8: W/C 20 October 2018
Athletico Phoenix v Aardvark Abacus
Cheese Makers v Mega Buck Bandits
Claymore Athletic FC v Wheel Madrid
Markian United v Fred West Landscape Gardening XI
Real Muppets v Nil Satis Nisi Optimum
San Dimas High School v The Wateringhole Society
The Fabulous Artisans v YTFIB
Trusted By Millions v The Cow-Faced Juniors


W/C 27 October: Paul Cartmell Memorial Trophy and Charity Shield Quarter Finals


League Week 9: W/C 3 November 2018
Aardvark Abacus v Cheese Makers
Fred West Landscape Gardening XI v Trusted By Millions
Mega Buck Bandits v Claymore Athletic FC
Nil Satis Nisi Optimum v Markian United
The Cow-Faced Juniors v The Fabulous Artisans
The Wateringhole Society v Athletico Phoenix
Wheel Madrid v Real Muppets
YTFIB v San Dimas High School


League Week 10: W/C 10 November 2018
Athletico Phoenix v YTFIB
Cheese Makers v The Wateringhole Society
Claymore Athletic FC v Real Muppets
Markian United v Wheel Madrid
Mega Buck Bandits v Aardvark Abacus
San Dimas High School v The Cow-Faced Juniors
The Fabulous Artisans v Fred West Landscape Gardening XI
Trusted By Millions v Nil Satis Nisi Optimum

League Week 11: W/C 24 November 2018
Aardvark Abacus v Claymore Athletic FC
Fred West Landscape Gardening XI v San Dimas High School
Nil Satis Nisi Optimum v The Fabulous Artisans
Real Muppets v Markian United
The Cow-Faced Juniors v Athletico Phoenix
The Wateringhole Society v Mega Buck Bandits
Wheel Madrid v Trusted By Millions
YTFIB v Cheese Makers


League Week 12: W/C 1 December 2018
Aardvark Abacus v The Wateringhole Society
Athletico Phoenix v Fred West Landscape Gardening XI
Cheese Makers v The Cow-Faced Juniors
Claymore Athletic FC v Markian United
Mega Buck Bandits v YTFIB
San Dimas High School v Nil Satis Nisi Optimum
The Fabulous Artisans v Wheel Madrid
Trusted By Millions v Real Muppets

Midweek 4/5 December: PCMT & Charity Shield SFs

League Week 13: W/C 8 December 2018
Fred West Landscape Gardening XI v Cheese Makers
Markian United v Trusted By Millions
Nil Satis Nisi Optimum v Athletico Phoenix
Real Muppets v The Fabulous Artisans
The Cow-Faced Juniors v Mega Buck Bandits
The Wateringhole Society v Claymore Athletic FC
Wheel Madrid v San Dimas High School
YTFIB v Aardvark Abacus


League Week 14: W/C 15 December 2017
Aardvark Abacus v The Cow-Faced Juniors
Athletico Phoenix v Wheel Madrid
Cheese Makers v Nil Satis Nisi Optimum
Claymore Athletic FC v Trusted By Millions
Mega Buck Bandits v Fred West Landscape Gardening XI
San Dimas High School v Real Muppets
The Fabulous Artisans v Markian United
The Wateringhole Society v YTFIB


League Week 15: W/C 22 December 2017
Fred West Landscape Gardening XI v Aardvark Abacus
Markian United v San Dimas High School
Nil Satis Nisi Optimum v Mega Buck Bandits
Real Muppets v Athletico Phoenix
The Cow-Faced Juniors v The Wateringhole Society
Trusted By Millions v The Fabulous Artisans
Wheel Madrid v Cheese Makers
YTFIB v Claymore Athletic FC


Charity Shield Final: 26 December 2018

Paul Cartmell Memorial Trophy Final: 29 December 2018


League Week 16 (reverse week 12): 1 January 2019
Fred West Landscape Gardening XI v Athletico Phoenix
Markian United v Claymore Athletic FC
Nil Satis Nisi Optimum v San Dimas High School
Real Muppets v Trusted By Millions
The Cow-Faced Juniors v Cheese Makers
The Wateringhole Society v Aardvark Abacus
Wheel Madrid v The Fabulous Artisans
YTFIB v Mega Buck Bandits


FA Cup 1at Round: 5 January 2019

League Week 17 (Reverse week 13): W/C 12 January 2019
Aardvark Abacus v YTFIB
Athletico Phoenix v Nil Satis Nisi Optimum
Cheese Makers v Fred West Landscape Gardening XI
Claymore Athletic FC v The Wateringhole Society
Mega Buck Bandits v The Cow-Faced Juniors
San Dimas High School v Wheel Madrid
The Fabulous Artisans v Real Muppets
Trusted By Millions v Markian United



League Week 18 (Reverse week 10): W/C 19 January 2019
Aardvark Abacus v Mega Buck Bandits
Fred West Landscape Gardening XI v The Fabulous Artisans
Nil Satis Nisi Optimum v Trusted By Millions
Real Muppets v Claymore Athletic FC
The Cow-Faced Juniors v San Dimas High School
The Wateringhole Society v Cheese Makers
Wheel Madrid v Markian United
YTFIB v Athletico Phoenix


League Week 19 (Reverse week 3): Midweek 29/30 January 2019
Claymore Athletic FC v San Dimas High School
Fred West Landscape Gardening XI v The Cow-Faced Juniors
Markian United v Mega Buck Bandits
Nil Satis Nisi Optimum v YTFIB
Real Muppets v Aardvark Abacus
The Fabulous Artisans v Athletico Phoenix
Trusted By Millions v Cheese Makers
Wheel Madrid v The Wateringhole Society

W/C 2 February: FA Cup Quarter Finals

League Week 20 (Reverse week 15): W/C 9 February 2019
Aardvark Abacus v Fred West Landscape Gardening XI
Athletico Phoenix v Real Muppets
Cheese Makers v Wheel Madrid
Claymore Athletic FC v YTFIB
Mega Buck Bandits v Nil Satis Nisi Optimum
San Dimas High School v Markian United
The Fabulous Artisans v Trusted By Millions
The Wateringhole Society v The Cow-Faced Juniors


League Week 21 (Reverse week 8): W/C 23 February 2019
Aardvark Abacus v Athletico Phoenix
Fred West Landscape Gardening XI v Markian United
Mega Buck Bandits v Cheese Makers
Nil Satis Nisi Optimum v Real Muppets
The Cow-Faced Juniors v Trusted By Millions
The Wateringhole Society v San Dimas High School
Wheel Madrid v Claymore Athletic FC
YTFIB v The Fabulous Artisans


League Week 22 (Reverse week 9): Midweek 26/27 February 2019
Athletico Phoenix v The Wateringhole Society
Cheese Makers v Aardvark Abacus
Claymore Athletic FC v Mega Buck Bandits
Markian United v Nil Satis Nisi Optimum
Real Muppets v Wheel Madrid
San Dimas High School v YTFIB
The Fabulous Artisans v The Cow-Faced Juniors
Trusted By Millions v Fred West Landscape Gardening XI


League Week 23 (Reverse week 4): W/C 2 March 2019
Aardvark Abacus v Markian United
Athletico Phoenix v San Dimas High School
Cheese Makers v The Fabulous Artisans
Fred West Landscape Gardening XI v Claymore Athletic FC
Mega Buck Bandits v Trusted By Millions
The Cow-Faced Juniors v Nil Satis Nisi Optimum
The Wateringhole Society v Real Muppets
YTFIB v Wheel Madrid


W/C 9 March: FA Cup Semi Finals


League Week 24 (Reverse week 5): W/C 16 March 2019
Claymore Athletic FC v Athletico Phoenix
Markian United v The Wateringhole Society
Nil Satis Nisi Optimum v Fred West Landscape Gardening XI
Real Muppets v YTFIB
San Dimas High School v Cheese Makers
The Fabulous Artisans v Mega Buck Bandits
Trusted By Millions v Aardvark Abacus
Wheel Madrid v The Cow-Faced Juniors


League Week 25 (Reverse week 6): W/C 30 March 2019
Aardvark Abacus v The Fabulous Artisans
Cheese Makers v Athletico Phoenix
Fred West Landscape Gardening XI v Wheel Madrid
Mega Buck Bandits v San Dimas High School
Nil Satis Nisi Optimum v Claymore Athletic FC
The Cow-Faced Juniors v Real Muppets
The Wateringhole Society v Trusted By Millions
YTFIB v Markian United



League Week 26 (Reverse week 7): W/C 6 April 2019
Athletico Phoenix v Mega Buck Bandits
Claymore Athletic FC v Cheese Makers
Markian United v The Cow-Faced Juniors
Real Muppets v Fred West Landscape Gardening XI
San Dimas High School v Aardvark Abacus
The Fabulous Artisans v The Wateringhole Society
Trusted By Millions v YTFIB
Wheel Madrid v Nil Satis Nisi Optimum



League Week 27 (Reverse week 1): W/C 13 April 2019
Claymore Athletic FC v The Fabulous Artisans
Fred West Landscape Gardening XI v The Wateringhole Society
Markian United v Athletico Phoenix
Nil Satis Nisi Optimum v Aardvark Abacus
Real Muppets v Cheese Makers
The Cow-Faced Juniors v YTFIB
Trusted By Millions v San Dimas High School
Wheel Madrid v Mega Buck Bandits


W/C 20 April: FA Cup Final


League Week 28 (Reverse week 2): W/C 27 April 2018
Aardvark Abacus v Wheel Madrid
Athletico Phoenix v Trusted By Millions
Cheese Makers v Markian United
Mega Buck Bandits v Real Muppets
San Dimas High School v The Fabulous Artisans
The Cow-Faced Juniors v Claymore Athletic FC
The Wateringhole Society v Nil Satis Nisi Optimum
YTFIB v Fred West Landscape Gardening XI


League Week 29 (Reverse week 11): W/C 4 May 2019
Athletico Phoenix v The Cow-Faced Juniors
Cheese Makers v YTFIB
Claymore Athletic FC v Aardvark Abacus
Markian United v Real Muppets
Mega Buck Bandits v The Wateringhole Society
San Dimas High School v Fred West Landscape Gardening XI
The Fabulous Artisans v Nil Satis Nisi Optimum
Trusted By Millions v Wheel Madrid


League Week 30 (Reverse week 14): W/C 12 May 2019
Fred West Landscape Gardening XI v Mega Buck Bandits
Markian United v The Fabulous Artisans
Nil Satis Nisi Optimum v Cheese Makers
Real Muppets v San Dimas High School
The Cow-Faced Juniors v Aardvark Abacus
Trusted By Millions v Claymore Athletic FC
Wheel Madrid v Athletico Phoenix
YTFIB v The Wateringhole Society





*Yep, it’s subject to change but then you knew that.

Sunday 1 July 2018

2018/19 Opening day fixtures announced

We're six weeks from the start of the new WSFFL season. The opening round of fixtures looks like this...

Aardvark Abacus v Nil Satis Nisi Optimum
Athletico Phoenix v Markian United
Cheese Makers v Real Muppets
Mega Buck Bandits v Wheel Madrid
San Dimas High School v Trusted By Millions
The Fabulous Artisans v Claymore Athletic FC
The Wateringhole Society v Fred West Landscape Gardening XI
YTFIB v The Cow-Faced Juniors   

Last season’s top two start with away games at two of last year’s bottom three. Full fixtures will be published in due course.