Week 17 Results - Artisans extend lead

Aardvark Abacus 1 v 1 YTFIB 

Claymore Athletic FC 1 v 2 The Fabulous Artisans

Garth Crooks' Team of the Week 2 v 4 Real Muppets

Mega Buck Bandits 1 v 1 Cheese Makers 

Nil Satis Nisi Optimum 2 v 0 Markian United 

San Dimas High School 1 v 1 Stanley and Gracie United

The Cow-Faced Juniors 2 v 1 Wheel Madrid

Trusted By Millions 1 v 1 The Wateringhole Society 

	Team	P	W	D	L	F	A	Diff	Pts
1	The Fabulous Artisans	17	13	2	2	39	23	16	41
2	The Wateringhole Society	17	12	1	4	51	28	23	37
3	Real Muppets	17	11	2	4	45	25	20	35
4	Aardvark Abacus	17	7	6	4	33	23	10	27
5	Stanley and Gracie United	17	7	5	5	32	30	2	26
6	The Cow-Faced Juniors	17	7	3	7	33	32	1	24
7	Claymore Athletic FC	17	7	3	7	32	31	1	24
8	Mega Buck Bandits	17	7	2	8	27	33	-6	23
9	Nil Satis Nisi Optimum	17	6	5	6	25	31	-6	23
10	Cheese Makers	17	6	4	7	28	35	-7	22
11	San Dimas High School	17	5	6	6	22	34	-12	21
12	Markian United	17	5	4	8	25	27	-2	19
13	Trusted By Millions	17	4	5	8	27	30	-3	17
14	Garth Crooks' Team of the Week	17	4	4	9	24	32	-8	16
15	YTFIB	17	3	4	10	20	36	-16	13
16	Wheel Madrid	17	2	4	11	17	30	-13	10

FA Cup 1st Round results - Wins for the bottom three

Aardvark Abacus 3 v 0 Claymore Athletic FC

Cheese Makers 4 v 4 Stanley and Gracie United

Mega Buck Bandits 2 v 5 The Cow-Faced Juniors

Nil Satis Nisi Optimum 1 v 2 Wheel Madrid

Real Muppets 0 v 3 Garth Crooks' Team of the Week

San Dimas High School 4 v 3 Markian United

The Wateringhole Society 4 v 5 The Fabulous Artisans

YTFIB 4 v 0 Trusted By Millions 

Replay

Stanley and Gracie United v Cheese Makers

I usually start these reports with how the holders got on. I’ll do that again today as I won’t get another chance this season. The Wateringhole Society are out after being on the wrong end of a nine-goal thriller against the Artisans. The scoring, Artisans first,  went 1-0, 1-1, 1-2, 2-2, 2-3, 3-3, 4-3, 4-4, 5-4. Ben’s Man of the Match was new signing Max Alleyne who scored the opener and added a clean sheet. Similarly thrilling was the 4-4 draw between Cheese Makers and SGU. In a breathtaking finale there were four goals in second half injury time. Rico Lewis and Pedro Neto goals cancelled each other out, Enzo Fernandez put Aaron in front on 90+4 but Anthony Gordon got the final equaliser of the game a minute later.

The PCMT-winning CFJs are on a terrible run in the league but the Cups seem to be bringing them to life. It's certainly revitalised Jorgen Strand Larsen whose hat-trick helped the Cows to a 5-2 win at Mega Bucks. Those three goals take the striker’s tally to four for the season. Claymore have won our FA Cup more times than anyone else still playing the game (five) but he won’t be adding to that tally after a 3-0 defeat at the Aardvarks. Morgan Rogers and Igor Jesus got on the scoresheet but the notable performer here was Aaron Hickey who got a clean for Ady just days after joining from Clive’s team.

San Dimas versus Markian was another cracking tie that finished 4-3 in my favour. Ian led once and equalised twice before Sepp van den Berg bagged the winning clean for the Saints. My three other scorers were all getting their first goal of the season. Great management. That should stave off the sack for a bit. Unless I have a go at the over-promoted Director of Football of course. Trusted are having a stinker of a season and YTFIB added to that by beating Beef’s team 4-0. Antoine Semenyo celebrated his new contract by getting the opener, Alex Scott and Kevin got their firsts of the campaign.

Another shock was the Muppets’ 3-0 reverse at home to Garth Crooks’ Team of the Week. A Gabriel Martinelli hat-trick including two near-post headers did the job for Ollie. Bottom of the table Wheel Madrid are also in to the quarters after winning 2-1 at Nil Satis. Emi Buendia opened the scoring for Wheels, James Garner levelled for Paul S late on but Hakn Rafn Valdimarsson picked up the wining clean sheet.

Week 16 Results - Top three breaking away

Cheese Makers 3  v 2 Nil Satis Nisi Optimum

Markian United 2 v 3 Garth Crooks' Team of the Week

Real Muppets 1 v 0 The Cow-Faced Juniors 

Stanley and Gracie United 1 v 4 Mega Buck Bandits 

The Fabulous Artisans 3 v 1 Aardvark Abacus

The Wateringhole Society 5 v 3 Claymore Athletic FC 

Wheel Madrid 1 v 2 Trusted By Millions 

YTFIB 1 v 2 San Dimas High School

	Team	P	W	D	L	F	A	Diff	Pts
1	The Fabulous Artisans	16	12	2	2	37	22	15	38
2	The Wateringhole Society	16	12	0	4	50	27	23	36
3	Real Muppets	16	10	2	4	41	23	18	32
4	Aardvark Abacus	16	7	5	4	32	22	10	26
5	Stanley and Gracie United	16	7	4	5	31	29	2	25
6	Claymore Athletic FC	16	7	3	6	31	29	2	24
7	Mega Buck Bandits	16	7	1	8	26	32	-6	22
8	The Cow-Faced Juniors	16	6	3	7	31	31	0	21
9	Cheese Makers	16	6	3	7	27	34	-7	21
10	Nil Satis Nisi Optimum	16	5	5	6	23	31	-8	20
11	San Dimas High School	16	5	5	6	21	33	-12	20
12	Markian United	16	5	4	7	25	25	0	19
13	Trusted By Millions	16	4	4	8	26	29	-3	16
14	Garth Crooks' Team of the Week	16	4	4	8	22	28	-6	16
15	YTFIB	16	3	3	10	19	35	-16	12
16	Wheel Madrid	16	2	4	10	16	28	-12	10

The Artisans left it late to turn round a deficit against the Aardvarks, three clean sheets eventually giving Ben a 3-1 win. The Wateringhole are still hot on their heels after coming out on top of Claymore 5-3 after what used to be called a ding-dong battle. Three-all after 65 minutes, Harvey Barnes put Kiran ahead 12 minutes into injury time and Jeremie Frimpong’s clean wrapped it up.

An Erling Haaland penalty was the only goal in the Muppets 1-0 win over the CFJs.* SGU have stalled in fifth and went down 4-1 to the in-form Mega Bucks, Dave now up to seventh.

Cheese Makers are recovering from their poor start and are ninth after beating Nil Satis 3-2. San Dimas had a debut goal from Mateus Mane in a 2-1 win over YTFIB.

Trusted got the better of Wheel Madrid 2-1 after going behind thanks to yet another own goal. Benjamin Sesko notched a brace for Markian only for GC TotW to turn round that two goal deficit to win 3-2.

* The CFJs have picked up just four counters in their last six league games. In contrast The Wateringhole have 36.

Own Goals

Do they even out? Do they make a difference? No idea but let's keep count anyway.

I've started on 2023/24 which is the first season I have full records.

All league games unless stated.

Totals

9 - Trusted By Millions (two PCMT)

5 - FW LG XI

5 - The Fabulous Artisans

4 - Aardvark Abacus

4 - Mega Buck Bandits

4 - Nil Satis Nisi Optimum

4 - San Dimas High School (one Charity Shield)

4 - Wheel Madrid

3 - Cheese Makers

3 - Stanley and Gracie United

3 - The Wateringhole Society (one FA Cup)

2 - Claymore Athletic FC (one PCMT)

2 - YTFIB (one PCMT)

1 - Garth Crooks' Team of the Week

1 - Real Muppets

1 - The Cow-Faced Juniors

2025/26

4 - Trusted By Millions (two PCMT)

2 - Stanley and Gracie United

2 - The Fabulous Artisans

1 - Cheese Makers

1 - Nil Satis Nisi Optimum

1 - San Dimas High School

1 - YTFIB

2024/25

3 - Mega Buck Bandits

2 - Cheese Makers

2 - The Fabulous Artisans

2 - Trusted By Millions

2 - Wheel Madrid

1 - Aardvark Abacus

1 - Claymore Athletic FC (PCMT)

1 - Garth Crooks' Team of the Week

1 - Nil Satis Nisi Optimum

1 - San Dimas High School

1 - Stanley and Gracie United

2023/24

5 - FW LG XI

3 - Aardvark Abacus

3 - The Wateringhole Society (one FA Cup)

3 - Trusted By Millions

2 - Nil Satis Nisi Optimum

2 - San Dimas High School (one Charity Shield)

2 - Wheel Madrid

1 - Claymore Athletic FC

1 - Mega Buck Bandits

1 - Real Muppets

1 - The Cow-Faced Juniors

1 - The Fabulous Artisans

1 - YTFIB (PCMT)

Week 15 Results - Halfway There

Cheese Makers 1 v 1 Aardvark Abacus 

Mega Buck Bandits 5 v 0 San Dimas High School 

Real Muppets 0 v 0 Nil Satis Nisi Optimum 

Stanley and Gracie United 2 v 2 Claymore Athletic FC

The Fabulous Artisans 2 v 1 The Cow-Faced Juniors

The Wateringhole Society 3 v 2 Garth Crooks' Team of the Week

Wheel Madrid 2 v 1 Markian United

YTFIB 2 v 0 Trusted By Millions

	Team	P	W	D	L	F	A	Diff	Pts
1	The Fabulous Artisans	15	11	2	2	34	21	13	35
2	The Wateringhole Society	15	11	0	4	45	24	21	33
3	Real Muppets	15	9	2	4	40	23	17	29
4	Aardvark Abacus	15	7	5	3	31	19	12	26
5	Stanley and Gracie United	15	7	4	4	30	25	5	25
6	Claymore Athletic FC	15	7	3	5	28	24	4	24
7	The Cow-Faced Juniors	15	6	3	6	31	30	1	21
8	Nil Satis Nisi Optimum	15	5	5	5	21	28	-7	20
9	Markian United	15	5	4	6	23	22	1	19
10	Mega Buck Bandits	15	6	1	8	22	31	-9	19
11	Cheese Makers	15	5	3	7	24	32	-8	18
12	San Dimas High School	15	4	5	6	19	32	-13	17
13	Trusted By Millions	15	3	4	8	24	28	-4	13
14	Garth Crooks' Team of the Week	15	3	4	8	19	26	-7	13
15	YTFIB	15	3	3	9	18	33	-15	12
16	Wheel Madrid	15	2	4	9	15	26	-11	10

he Artisans have the hallway lead after a 2-1 win over the CFJs. Was Florian Wirtz offside when he levelled in this one? What are the rules? What are rules for that matter? Anyway, it counted and Bart Verbruggen’s clean was Ben's winner. There was a late winner for the Wateringhole too. Kiran’s team bounced back from PCMT Final disappointment with a 3-2 win over GC TotW. Ollie’s team led twice, the second time thanks to a brilliant Brian Brobbey effort, but Cody Gakpo arrived at the back post four minutes into injury time to nab the points.

The supercomputer thinks the league is between the top two. Has it written the Muppets off too soon? Ryan’s team were held 0-0 by Nil Satis this week to fall six points behind. The Aardvarks also drew, 1-1 with Cheese Makers, to lose ground. Ollie Watkins’ goal just before halftime levelled just after by Tijjani Reijnders.

SGU and Claymore are fifth and sixth after their 2-2 draw this week. Thierno Barry looked to have won it for Clive in injury time but Enzo Fernadez struck even later to grab Aaron a point. Markian are top of the bottom half after a 2-1 defeat at Wheel Madrid. John McGinn’s two goals have Wheels on double figure points but still at the foot at the table.

Mega Bucks are up to tenth after dispatching San Dimas 5-0. There were two goals from Declan Rice for Dave. YTFIB avoided bottom spot by beating Trusted 2-0. Nathan Collins headed in and Nick Pope got the clean they see Beef’s team just three points off the bottom.