Week 2 Results

Aardvark Abacus 8 v 1 Mega Buck Bandits
Athletico Phoenix 1 v 3 Final Fantasy XI
Fred West Landscape Gardening XI 2 v 1 Nil Satis Nisi Optimum
San Dimas High School 6 v 4 Bassett Allsorts
The Cow-Faced Juniors 4 v 2 Claymore Athletic FC
The Dead Parrots 4 v 3 Trusted By Millions
The Fabulous Artisans 0 v 5 Real Muppets
You Know Your Boston Rock FC 6 v 1 York’s Returning Glory

The champions begin their defence with two six-goal performances. Sound familiar? Boston Rock fell behind to a Joey Barton goal for York's but Andy Carroll with a hat-trick and Kevin Nolan with a brace started repaying the £19.5m Sheriff spent on the pair. Boston rock leapfrog Fred at the top as the 'Gardeners' struggled to a 2-1 win over Nil Satis. Paul ahead through the reliable Tim Cahill but a Ben Foster saved penalty and Paolo Ferreira clean swung the game in Fred's favour. Nil Satis are one of four teams without a point.

Fred are only above the Muppets on alphabetical order. Ryan's team made short work of the Fabulous Artisans this week with Florent Malouda opening the scoring before Carlos Tevez notched a second-half brace. Not a great start from the Artisans who are now four without a win if we take last season into consideration. The CFJs are our last 100% team. Two from Gareth Bale (what a strike that second one was) in the first half and two from Nicolas Anelka in the second too much for Claymore. Clive's charges are a lowly 15th after running into two good performances from their opponents.

The Dead Parrots are still unbeaten after playing two of last year's top five. A point against the Artisans last week was followed by victory over Trusted. Gareth Barry swept home on 13 minutes to open the scoring for Dean but Beef seemed to be cruising to a win before three unanswered cleans took the points down under. Beef's great result against the Aardvarks last week quickly undone. Speaking of the Aardvarks they bounced back from that first week defeat on emphatic style. Paul Scholes gave Ady a 1-0 half-time lead but the Mega Bucks defence melted away after the break with even Craig Gardner scoring twice for the 'Earth-Pigs'. Dave's team have now conceded a quarter of the goals they did in the entirety of last season.

Goals aplenty at San Dimas too. Ben's Allsorts can feel a bit hard done by to still be pointless after scoring four themselves but being on the receiving end of Johan Elmander doubling his last season tally and Theo Walcott scoring more in 46 minutes than he's managed in the last two seasons. I know it's early days but it's my highest league position since week 14 two seasons ago. Final Fantasy broke their duck too with a 3-1 win at the Phoenix. Arshavin's penalty for Ceri was cancelled out for Brian by Abou Diaby just after the break but clean sheets from Carson and Enrique get Final Fantasy off the mark.