Points records

Which teams have picked up the most points? And, a bit lower down, what are each team's best season haul?

I'm concentrating on the 16 team era here.

71 - Aardvark Abacus (1st 2023/24)

69 - You Know Your Boston Rock FC (1st 2005/6)

68 - Kylie Bumcheeks (1st 2002/3)

67 - Fred West Landscape Gardening XI (1st 2022/23)

67 - Aardvark Abacus (1st 2001/2)

66 - Fred West Landscape Gardening XI (1st 2016/17)

66 - Aardvark Abacus (1st 2008/9)

64 - Fred West Landscape Gardening XI (1st 2018/19)

64 - The Cow-Faced Juniors (1st 2012/13)

64 - Fred West Landscape Gardening XI (1st 2010/11)

64 - Aardvark Abacus (2nd 2002/3)

63 - You Know Your Boston Rock FC (1st 2009/10)

63 - Aardvark Abacus (1st 2007/8)

63 - Claymore Athletic FC (1st 2004/5)

63 - Claymore Athletic FC (2nd 2012/13)

The first season (36 games) was won with 74 points by Bassett Allsorts. 

Then we had six seasons of 34 matches. Two teams topped 70 points in 1999/2000 - Mega Buck Bandits won the league with 74 points, runners-up Trusted By Millions finished with 70.

Here are the best totals for each team* since we went to a 16 team league in 2001/2. Teams in italics are no longer in the game.

71 - Aardvark Abacus (1st 2023/24)

69 - You Know Your Boston Rock FC (1st 2005/6)

68 - Kylie Bumcheeks (1st 2002/3)

67 - Fred West Landscape Gardening XI (1st 2022/23)

64 - The Cow-Faced Juniors (1st 2012/13)

63 - Claymore Athletic FC (1st 2004/5 and 2nd 2012/13)

59 - Trusted By Millions (1st 2013/14)

58 - Athletico Phoenix (3rd 2012/13)

57 - Eleven Imaginary Boys (3rd 2007/8)

57 - Real Muppets (2nd 2001/2)

56 - San Dimas High School (3rd 2001/2)

56 - The Fabulous Artisans (2nd 2023/24)

55 - The Wateringhole Society (1st 2021/22)

55 - Stanley Athletic FC (2nd 2019/20)

53 - Prettier Than You (3rd 2006/7)

52 - Nil Satis Nisi Optimum (4th 2006/7)

49 - Final Fantasy XI (5th 2012/13)

49 - 22 Legged Groove Machine (7th 2006/7)

47 - Markian United (6th 2022/23)

47 - Cheese Makers (6th (2021/22)

47 - Wheel Madrid (7th 2016/17)

46 - Mega Buck Bandits (7th 2019/20)

46 - FCK2 (7th 2014/15)

46 - The Dead Parrots/Elland Road Big Boys (8th 2003/4)

44 - YTFIB/York's Returning Glory - (9th 2019/20)

38 - Thommo's Titans (11th 2003/4)

34 - Short Straw Rovers (12th 2002/3)

33 - Dynamo Kev/Melwood FC (12th 2007/8)

31 - SCP Marmosets (13th 2007/8)

28 - Bassett Allsorts (14th 2010/11)

24 - Viola's Pier (13th 2001/2)

* - Probably, I haven't spent ages on this.

Player season scoring records

A certain Norwegian prompted this one. Here's a list of top WSFFL scorers (20+ gets you in) and the season they achieved that. The earliest season we have full records on is 2007/8. (Will I look back before that at some point - unlikely but you never know.)

We're talking counters here, not goals, which is why you'll see some defenders on the list, and the total is across all competitions. (I've left own goals out.)

34 - Erling Haaland (2022/23 - Real Muppets)

31 - Harry Kane (2022/23 - Markian United)

27 - Robin van Persie (2011/12 - Athletico Phoenix)

27 - Cristiano Ronaldo (2007/08 - Real Muppets)

26 - Erling Haaland (2023/24 - Real Muppets)

26 - Harry Kane (2017/18 - Markian United)

26 - Luis Suarez (2013/14 - The Cow-Faced Juniors)

26 - Robin van Persie (2012/13 - Athletico Phoenix)

26 - Wayne Rooney (2011/12 - Claymore Athletic FC)

24 - Virgil van Dijk (2021/22 - Stanley Athletic FC

24 - Romelu Lukaku (2016/17 - San Dimas High School)

24 - Rio Ferdinand (2007/08 - YKY Boston Rock FC)

23 - Jamie Vardy (2019/20 - Wheel Madrid)

23 - Virgil van Dijk (2018/19 - Athletico Phoenix)

23 - Mohamed Salah (2017/18 - FW LG XI)

23 - Sergio Aguero (2017/18 - Claymore Athletic FC)

23 - Sergio Aguero (2015/16 - Claymore Athletic FC)

23 - Sergio Aguero (2014/15 - Claymore Athletic FC)

22 - Harry Kane (2020/21 - Markian United)

22 - Sergio Aguero (2019/20 - Claymore Athletic FC)

22 - Marcos Alonso (2017/18 - Nil Satis Nisi Optimum)

22 - Harry Kane (2016/17 - FCK2)

22 - Luis Suarez (2012/13 - The Cow-Faced Juniors)

22 - Gareth Bale (2012/13 - The Cow-Faced Juniors)

22 - Nemanja Vidic (2008/09 - FW LG XI)

21 - Alexis Sanchez (2016/17 -  The Cow-Faced Juniors)

21 - Sergio Aguero (2011/12 - Claymore Athletic FC)

21 - Frank Lampard (2009/10 - YKY Boston Rock FC)

21 - John Terry (2009/10 - YKY Boston Rock FC)

21 - Edwin van der Sar (2008/09 - The Cow-Faced Juniors)

21 - Joleon Lescott (2007/08 - Nil Satis Nisi Optimum)

20 - Alexander Isak (2023/24 - Trusted By Millions)

20 - Phil Foden (2023/24 - Real Muppets)

20 - Pierre-Emerick Aubameyang (2019/20 - Mega Buck Bandits)

20 - Aymeric Laporte (2018/19  The Cow-Faced Juniors)

20 - Mohamed Salah (2018/19 - FW LG XI)

20 - Pierre-Emerick Aubameyang (2018/19 - Mega Buck Bandits)

20 - Gary Cahill (2016/17 - Trusted By Millions)

20 - Sergio Aguero (2016/17 - Claymore Athletic FC)

20 - Harry Kane (2015/16 - FCK2)

20 - Gareth Bale (2011/12 - The Cow-Faced Juniors)

20 - Branislav Ivanovic (2010/11 - Claymore Athletic FC)

20 - Carlos Tevez (2009/10 - Real Muppets)

20 - Patrice Evra (2007/08 - FW LG XI)

Oh go on then - here's the league only list.

27 - Erling Haaland (2022/23 - Real Muppets)

25 - Robin van Persie (2011/12 - Athletico Phoenix)

24 - Harry Kane (2022/23 - Markian United)

24 - Cristiano Ronaldo (2007/08 - Real Muppets)

23 - Virgil van Dijk (2018/19 - Athletico Phoenix)

23 - Harry Kane (2017/18 - Markian United)

23 - Robin van Persie (2012/13 - Athletico Phoenix)

22 - Wayne Rooney (2011/12 - Claymore Athletic FC)

21 - Erling Haaland (2023/24 - Real Muppets)

21 - Nemanja Vidic (2008/09 - FW LG XI)

20 - Virgil van Dijk (2021/22 - Stanley Athletic FC)

20 - Mohamed Salah (2017/18 - FW LG XI)

20 - Harry Kane (2016/17 - FCK2)

20 - Carlos Tevez (2009/10 - Real Muppets)

Week 30 Results - Five-time winners at top and bottom

Claymore Athletic FC 1 v 0 YTFIB

Fred West Landscape Gardening XI 3 v 1 Real Muppets 

Markian United 3 v 5 Aardvark Abacus

San Dimas High School 1 v 6 Mega Buck Bandits

Stanley and Gracie United 1 v 2 The Fabulous Artisans 

The Cow-Faced Juniors 1 v 3 Trusted By Millions

The Wateringhole Society 4 v 0 Nil Satis Nisi Optimum

Wheel Madrid 0 v 2 Cheese Makers

	Team	P	W	D	L	F	A	Diff	Pts
1	Fred West Landscape Gardening XI	30	20	7	3	79	33	46	67
2	The Cow-Faced Juniors	30	18	5	7	83	50	33	59
3	The Fabulous Artisans	30	17	2	11	74	56	18	53
4	The Wateringhole Society	30	15	7	8	81	56	25	52
5	Trusted By Millions	30	14	5	11	65	50	15	47
6	Markian United	30	14	5	11	63	53	10	47
7	Stanley and Gracie United	30	15	2	13	56	60	-4	47
8	Aardvark Abacus	30	13	7	10	63	62	1	46
9	San Dimas High School	30	11	7	12	49	61	-12	40
10	Real Muppets	30	11	3	16	64	65	-1	36
11	Cheese Makers	30	9	7	14	41	50	-9	34
12	Wheel Madrid	30	10	4	16	30	61	-31	34
13	YTFIB	30	8	8	14	39	63	-24	32
14	Nil Satis Nisi Optimum	30	8	5	17	29	56	-27	29
15	Mega Buck Bandits	30	7	6	17	40	58	-18	27
16	Claymore Athletic FC	30	7	6	17	39	61	-22	27

Fred got the win (3-1 over the Muppets) to give him his highest points total and equal his own fewest defeats record. With just one defeat since league 10 he’s made it look emphatic. Taiwo Awoniyi, Bruno Fernandes and Jakub Kiwior got the goals and should all be around next year as the spine to the team. That’s four titles in the last seven seasons but he does seem to take a year off after winning which gives the rest of us some hope.

Despite being best of the rest I got the feeling that Chris was never convinced his team were quite good enough to take the title. A 2-1 defeat to Trusted on the final day meant it was a mere five points from the last six games which backed that thought up. Question marks over Rodrigo’s future add to his forward conundrum going into the summer. 

A poor run over the winter stopped Ben getting into the title shake-up. He finished with a 2-1 win at SGU to seal third (seven wins and two draws in his last nine games) and add that to his FA Cup win. Evan Ferguson looks a good signing for the future and he’ll expect to be thereabouts again.

The Wateringhole Society had an unlucky run in October/November where they scored nine times in four games and only had three points to show for it. The chase eventually ran out of steam with six defeats in the last two months. Counters for Cody Gakpo and Jan Paul van Hecke in their final day 4-0 win over Nil Satis shows Kiran still has an eye for a player.

Trusted’s win at the CFJs saw Beef finish fifth to go alongside his FA Cup final defeat. He’ll be rueing injuries to Luis Diaz, Gabriel Jesus and record-signing Alexander Isak but even with those players fit he might need a bit more to be at the sharp end. 

Despite finishing no higher than 14th in the last four seasons Ian assured me he was after a top half finish before we got under way this season. Sixth (and two semi-finals) is a great return and although a last day defeat stopped that being even better he’ll be satisfied with his season’s work. As will Harry Kane who’d be the owner of a WSFFL record if it wasn’t for a certain Norwegian.

Aaron fancied fourth but his defeat to Trusted made it a seventh place finish for the second season running. Possible departures for Martial and Havertz plus a question mark over James Ward-Prowse’s future will give the SGU boss plenty to think about this summer.

The Aardvarks finished with an excellent 5-3 win at Markian. Eighth place is a step up on last year for Ady but he’ll be wondering how Son Heung-min dropped from Golden Boot to just six goals all season. A Declan Rice sale could top up the Aardvark war-chest ahead of next season.

San Dimas had finished seventh or eighth in seven of the last eight seasons. That was already out of reach before this week’s 6-1 defeat to Mega Bucks. A Charity Shield and ninth this year looked the best possible outcome for a team with a solid defence but is still short of goals.

The Muppets certainly weren’t short of goals from Erling Haaland who broke scoring records in his first season. Ryan landed the PCMT this season and looks to have one of the strongest starting XI’s but for whatever reason they’re not all clicking at the same time.

Cheese Makers made a shocking start to the season, waiting until week 10 for a first win. Their last day 2-0 victory at Wheel Madrid rounded off a great end to the campaign, unbeaten in the last seven games. Matthew will be hoping his squad isn’t too disrupted by transfers this summer.

Wheel Madrid boss Paul W seemed to be ‘on the beach’ a bit early this season. Over the last 11 weeks his team only picked up seven counters but still managed to turn that into seven points. Plenty of work to do on the squad this summer to repeat the decent early season form.

YTFIB finished with a tame defeat to Claymore but overall had a decent season. There was even a five game unbeaten run along the way. Nick Pope and Ilkay Gundogan were Julian’s stars this season and he looks to have one for the future in Julio Enciso.

Nil Satis had a decent start to the campaign and were as high as sixth by week 14. I don’t know if it was a different beach to Paul W but Paul S was certainly on one and his team only won twice in the second half of the season. Nearly lost most of his squad too. Careless!

Mega Bucks bounced between the bottom two places for two thirds of the season but a Granit Xhaka inspired big win over San Dimas kept him off the bottom when the music stopped. Investment on Antony hasn’t paid off yet and Dave might need a Wilf Zaha replacement too next season.

Clive’s final day 1-0 over YTFIB wasn’t enough to keep him out of bottom spot for the first time. Undoubtedly missed Mitrovic during spells of injury and suspension but maybe the ’Tinkerman’ approach (55 transfers!) played a part in just two wins in the second half of the season.

Week 29 Results - A fifth title for Fred

Cheese Makers 2 v 2 Aardvark Abacus

Mega Buck Bandits 0 v 1 Wheel Madrid

Nil Satis Nisi Optimum 1 v 1 Fred West Landscape Gardening XI 

Real Muppets 1 v 2 Markian United 

The Cow-Faced Juniors 2 v 2 Claymore Athletic FC 

The Wateringhole Society 0 v 1 San Dimas High School 

Trusted By Millions 2 v 3 The Fabulous Artisans

YTFIB 1 v 1 Stanley and Gracie United

	Team	P	W	D	L	F	A	Diff	Pts
1	Fred West Landscape Gardening XI	29	19	7	3	76	32	44	64
2	The Cow-Faced Juniors	29	18	5	6	82	47	35	59
3	The Fabulous Artisans	29	16	2	11	72	55	17	50
4	The Wateringhole Society	29	14	7	8	77	56	21	49
5	Markian United	29	14	5	10	60	48	12	47
6	Stanley and Gracie United	29	15	2	12	55	58	-3	47
7	Trusted By Millions	29	13	5	11	62	49	13	44
8	Aardvark Abacus	29	12	7	10	58	59	-1	43
9	San Dimas High School	29	11	7	11	48	55	-7	40
10	Real Muppets	29	11	3	15	63	62	1	36
11	Wheel Madrid	29	10	4	15	30	59	-29	34
12	YTFIB	29	8	8	13	39	62	-23	32
13	Cheese Makers	29	8	7	14	39	50	-11	31
14	Nil Satis Nisi Optimum	29	8	5	16	29	52	-23	29
15	Claymore Athletic FC	29	6	6	17	38	61	-23	24
16	Mega Buck Bandits	29	6	6	17	34	57	-23	24

It was far from his best performance of the season but a 1-1 draw at Nil Satis was enough for Fred to take this season’s title with a game to spare. Morgan Gibbs-White and Taiwo Awoniyi have come to the fore in recent weeks and the two combined for the Gardeners’ early goal. Sven Botman got Paul’s clean to level but with the CFJs held 2-2 by Claymore the Fred fans could begin their celebrations.

In that game Rodrigo volleyed the Cows ahead on 17 minutes but an Aleksandar Mitrovic brace (how Clive has missed him) had turned the game round just after the hour mark. Yoan Wissa got the equaliser with two minutes left but the winner wasn’t forthcoming. The Artisans are up to third after winning their cup final repeat against Trusted. Evan Ferguson looks a fine prospect and scored twice before halftime to put Ben in control. Jarrod Bowen beat the offside trap to make it 3-0 and Beef could only come up with a couple of consolation cleans. The Wateringhole dropped a place after going down 1-0 to San Dimas. Dan Burn’s clean was the winner for me.

Markian have got their best points total and their best finish in the bag already. How far can they go? Fabian Schar’s clean was the winner for Ian against the Muppets after Harry Kane’s stunning strike had been equalised by Jacob Ramsey. SGU join Markian on 47 points after a 1-1 draw with YTFIB. Pascal Gross’s low shot with 20 minutes left put Aaron ahead, Joel Ward bundled in a late equaliser for Julian.

Casemiro’s acrobatic finish and Julian Alvarez’ precise shot across the keeper had Cheese Makers 2-0 up against the Aardvarks inside 12 minutes. Declan Rice side-footed a volley in to pull one back after half an hour and Kieran Tierney’s clean earned Ady a point. Rafael Varane’s clean sheet was enough for Wheel Madrid to beat Mega Bucks and send them back to the foot of the table.