Paul Cartmell Memorial Trophy semi-final results

Looks like the holders are keen to hang on to the Trophy.

Athletico Phoenix 1 v 0 San Dimas High School
The Cow-Faced Juniors 9 v 3 The Fabulous Artisans


The CFJs will get the chance to defend the Trophy at Wembley on Boxing Day after a nine-goal demolition of the Artisans,  Luis Suarez doing the main damage with a stunning first-half hat-trick. Every time Ben tried to get a foothold in the match the CFJs would reply. Chamakh pulled it back to 3-1 before the break with a glancing header but Mesut Ozil struck at the near post just after half time. Vlad Chiriches picked out the bottom corner from 30 yards to bring it back to 4-2 but Suarez converted a free-kick a minute later to restore the advantage. A long range shot from Jonjo Shelvey got it back to 5-3 but then Chris's cleans rolled in to complete the competition's biggest win.

Athletico Phoenix will be the CFJs opponents in the Final after edging out San Dimas. If my team had made it through we would have had a repeat of last year's final but Brian settled this game early on. The only goal coming in the second minute from the unlikely head of Nicklas Bendtner.

Week 11 Results

The Muppets keep top spot but a shocker for Ady.

Athletico Phoenix 0 v 3 Claymore Athletic FC
FCK2 1 v 2 YTFIB

Final Fantasy XI 2 v 3 San Dimas High School

Mega Buck Bandits 0 v 2 Real Muppets

Nil Satis Nisi Optimum 6 v 0 Aardvark Abacus

The Cow-Faced Juniors 2 v 1 Fred West Landscape Gardening XI

The Fabulous Artisans 4 v 0 The Dead Parrots

Trusted By Millions 2 v 0 Cheese Makers


	Team	P	W	D	L	F	A	Diff	Pts
1	Real Muppets	11	7	2	2	24	16	8	23
2	The Cow-Faced Juniors	11	7	1	3	24	13	11	22
3	The Fabulous Artisans	11	7	1	3	30	20	10	22
4	Claymore Athletic FC	11	7	0	4	30	23	7	21
5	San Dimas High School	11	6	1	4	26	19	7	19
6	Aardvark Abacus	11	6	1	4	19	16	3	19
7	Trusted By Millions	11	5	3	3	19	15	4	18
8	Mega Buck Bandits	11	4	3	4	16	17	-1	15
9	Nil Satis Nisi Optimum	11	4	2	5	21	20	1	14
10	Cheese Makers	11	4	2	5	16	24	-8	14
11	Athletico Phoenix	11	4	1	6	18	27	-9	13
12	Final Fantasy XI	11	3	3	5	17	20	-3	12
13	FCK2	11	3	1	7	17	23	-6	10
14	Fred West Landscape Gardening XI	11	2	3	6	18	26	-8	9
15	The Dead Parrots	11	2	3	6	11	19	-8	9
16	YTFIB	11	2	3	6	9	17	-8	9

A 2-0 win for the Muppets over Mega Bucks keeps Ryan top. Both goals were second-half efforts from midfielders Mo Diame and Joe Cole. The CFJs are a point behind in second. Chris needing a Ron Vlaar clean sheet to edge out Fred after Sandro's cracking equaliser.

The Artisans got back to winning ways seeing off the Parrots 4-0. Alvaro Negredo got things moving with an early free-kick, Chris Brunt and two cleans did the rest of the damage. Claymore's great form continues, Clive seeing off Athletico Phoenix 3-0 with a Wayne Rooney brace setting up the win.

San Dimas are still at the happy end of the table after eking out a 3-2 win over Final Fantasy. Sylvain Distin's clean was the difference after Ceri's team had come from behind twice and looked like grabbing a point. Story of the day was Paul's 6-0 win over Ady. According to my records it's the Aardvarks' heaviest league defeat. Aaron Ramsey (the new Gareth Bale?) got two more and John O'Shea, Seamus Coleman and Brian Oviedo also got in on the act.

Goals from Steven Gerrard and Gary Cahill made it back-to-back league wins for Trusted for the first time this season, Matthew's Cheese Makers the victims. YTFIB got their first win since week one. Samir Nasri's brace delivering victory over FCK2 but not hauling Julian off the bottom.

Week 10 results

With the top three all losing the Muppets become the fifth team to lead the league this season.

Aardvark Abacus 0 v 1 Trusted By Millions
Cheese Makers 3 v 3 Athletico Phoenix

Claymore Athletic FC 5 v 3 The Fabulous Artisans

Fred West Landscape Gardening XI 1 v 1 Nil Satis Nisi Optimum
Real Muppets 3 v 2 The Cow-Faced Juniors

San Dimas High School 2 v 2 Mega Buck Bandits

The Dead Parrots 4 v 2 FCK2

YTFIB 0 v 0 Final Fantasy XI


	Team	P	W	D	L	F	A	Diff	Pts
1	Real Muppets	10	6	2	2	22	16	6	20
2	The Cow-Faced Juniors	10	6	1	3	22	12	10	19
3	Aardvark Abacus	10	6	1	3	19	10	9	19
4	The Fabulous Artisans	10	6	1	3	26	20	6	19
5	Claymore Athletic FC	10	6	0	4	27	23	4	18
6	San Dimas High School	10	5	1	4	23	17	6	16
7	Trusted By Millions	10	4	3	3	17	15	2	15
8	Mega Buck Bandits	10	4	3	3	16	15	1	15
9	Cheese Makers	10	4	2	4	16	22	-6	14
10	Athletico Phoenix	10	4	1	5	18	24	-6	13
11	Final Fantasy XI	10	3	3	4	15	17	-2	12
12	Nil Satis Nisi Optimum	10	3	2	5	15	20	-5	11
13	FCK2	10	3	1	6	16	21	-5	10
14	The Dead Parrots	10	2	3	5	11	15	-4	9
15	Fred West Landscape Gardening XI	10	2	3	5	17	24	-7	9
16	YTFIB	10	1	3	6	7	16	-9	6

We're a third of the way through the season and there's no team that's getting a grip on the title race and the Muppets are our fifth leader of the campaign. Ryan's team got the best of the late action over the CFJs when a Danny Sturridge flick header put him 2-1 up with a minute left only for Kim Something-Something to equalise a minute later. A Martin Demichelis clean gave the Muppets all the points and other results took them top. The Aardvarks suffered another defeat, this time to Trusted. In a close match Beef's team got the win thanks to aaron Hughes shinning into his own net.

The Artisans also lost, to a rampant Claymore team who are up to fifth and just two points off the top. Ben was ahead after two minutes when Loic Remy was left unattended at the far post but two goals each from Sergio Aguero and Olivier Giroud plus another from Leroy Fer were too much for the Artisans who found replies from Alvaro Negredo and Jonjo Shelvey. San Dimas missed a chance to close the gap and shared the spoils with Mega Bucks. Dave's team were two up early on. Philippe Coutinho and Charlie Adam were both given the freedom of my penalty area and I needed a much-improved second-half performance and two goals from battering ram Romelu Lukaku to grab me a point.

Another game of two halves was at the Stade de Fromage. Matthew's team raced into a 3-0 lead over the Phoenix inside 11 minutes. Two excellent strikes from Shane Long and one from Kevin Mirallas had the Cheesers in control but Patrice Evra pulled one back right on half-time for Brian. (He scores a lot of headers for a short bloke. Evra, not Brian.) Matthew's team couldn't kill the game off and cleans from Pablo Zabaleta and Per Mertersacker made it 3-3. Final Fantasy are still looking for a win since picking up August's MOTM. Ceri's team held 0-0 by YTFIB this week.

FCK2 are another team searching for a win. It took 14 seconds for Jesus Navas to give the Parrots the lead and despite Frank Lampard bagging two for Kevin, Scott Parker, Navas again and an Eric Pieters clean kept the points in Oz. Fred has stockpiled plenty of Brazilian midfielders but one he hasn't got, Oscar, gave Nil Satis the lead in their clash. Paul's team couldn't finish the job off though and Cesar Azpilicueta (Dave to his teammates) got an equalising clean.

Charity Shield semi-finals draw

Tough one for the holders away at Claymore. Clive will fancy being the first winner of all four trophies.

Claymore Athletic FC v The Dead Parrots
Trusted By Millions v Mega Buck Bandits

Games to be played midweek 3/4 December.

Paul Cartmell Memorial Trophy semi-final draw

The last two winners against each other - two teams who've never won it against each other.

Athletico Phoenix v San Dimas High School
The Cow-Faced Juniors v The Fabulous Artisans


Games to be played midweek 3/4 December

Week 9 Results

Ady off the top and Dean off the mark.

Aardvark Abacus 0 v 1 Cheese Makers
FCK2 1 v 2 Claymore Athletic FC 

Final Fantasy XI 0 v 3 The Dead Parrots

Mega Buck Bandits 2 v 1 YTFIB
Nil Satis Nisi Optimum 1 v 1 Real Muppets

The Cow-Faced Juniors 3 v 1 San Dimas High School


The Fabulous Artisans 4 v 2 Athletico Phoenix
Trusted By Millions 2 v 4 Fred West Landscape Gardening XI


	Team	P	W	D	L	F	A	Diff	Pts
1	The Cow-Faced Juniors	9	6	1	2	20	9	11	19
2	Aardvark Abacus	9	6	1	2	19	9	10	19
3	The Fabulous Artisans	9	6	1	2	23	15	8	19
4	Real Muppets	9	5	2	2	19	14	5	17
5	San Dimas High School	9	5	0	4	21	15	6	15
6	Claymore Athletic FC	9	5	0	4	22	20	2	15
7	Mega Buck Bandits	9	4	2	3	14	13	1	14
8	Cheese Makers	9	4	1	4	13	19	-6	13
9	Trusted By Millions	9	3	3	3	16	15	1	12
10	Athletico Phoenix	9	4	0	5	15	21	-6	12
11	Final Fantasy XI	9	3	2	4	15	17	-2	11
12	FCK2	9	3	1	5	14	17	-3	10
13	Nil Satis Nisi Optimum	9	3	1	5	14	19	-5	10
14	Fred West Landscape Gardening XI	9	2	2	5	16	23	-7	8
15	The Dead Parrots	9	1	3	5	7	13	-6	6
16	YTFIB	9	1	2	6	7	16	-9	5

Ady had been Lording it over the league for a few weeks but has now been knocked off the top. Matthew would have expected more from Shane Long over his career but he was the Cheese Makers darling this week as he rose to head in the only goal of the game. Last year's champions the CFJs are now in top spot after a 3-1 win over San Dimas. Chris' cunning plan to dodge Bebe in worked to perfection and added a Samuel Eto'o goal to a brace from Luis Suarez nine minutes either side of the break. Libor Kozak pulled one back for me.

The Fabulous Artisans are on the same points total as the top two after beating old rivals Athletico Phoenix 4-2. Brian doesn't lose many when Robin van Persie scores but was three down before the Dutchman flashed in a header on 27 minutes. Loic Remy, Stephen Ireland and Martin Skrtel had already registered for the Artisans and a superb free-kick from Leandro Bacuna with 15 minutes to go ended hopes of a Phoenix fightback. The Muppets missed a chance to join the top three on 19 points as they were pegged back by Nil Satis. Ravel Morrison converted from close range on 32 minutes but Seamus Coleman's clean grabbed a point for Paul.

Alarm bells were ringing for Claymore as time ran down and he trailed FCK2 to a Nathan Dyer goal. Midfield general Leroy Fer struck from outside the box on 90 minutes to loosen the chains and a Jonny Evans clean gave Clive all the points. A YTFIB win as elusive as the Scarlet Pimpernel at the moment. Julian's team went down to Mega Bucks this week. Yannick Sagbo (which is Gujarati for potato curry) opened the scoring from distance for Dave and a dubious penalty decision gave Charlie Adam the chance to double the advantage from the spot. Dean Moxey got YTFIB's consolation clean but his team is now bottom.

Ceri's form is a shadow of what it was earlier in the season and Final Fantasy handed the Dead Parrots their first league win of the season. Rickie Lambert struck first for Dean from the spot and Robert Snodgrass added a free-kick and Mathieu Debuchy a clean to get the Parrots off the foot of the table. Down at the wrong end Fred picked up a win too, 4-2 over Trusted. Beef's team were twice in front. Adam Lallana twisted and turned like a twisty, turny thing through Fred's defence to open the scoring and Stephane Sessegnon's shot bobbled through to make it 2-1. Both those goals were cancelled out by Wilfried Bony efforts and Eden Hazard got a controversial penalty to put Fred ahead. When the protesting stopped a Younes Kaboul clean finished the game.

Week 8 Results

Some big wins around this week.

Athletico Phoenix 5 v 1 FCK2

Cheese Makers 0 v 4 The Fabulous Artisans

Claymore Athletic FC 5 v 2 Final Fantasy XI

Fred West Landscape Gardening XI 1 v 5 Aardvark Abacus
Real Muppets 1 v 1 Trusted By Millions

San Dimas High School 4 v 1 Nil Satis Nisi Optimum

The Dead Parrots 1 v 1 Mega Buck Bandits

YTFIB 0 v 1 The Cow-Faced Juniors



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	Team	P	W	D	L	F	A	Diff	Pts
1	Aardvark Abacus	8	6	1	1	19	8	11	19
2	The Cow-Faced Juniors	8	5	1	2	17	8	9	16
3	The Fabulous Artisans	8	5	1	2	19	13	6	16
4	Real Muppets	8	5	1	2	18	13	5	16
5	San Dimas High School	8	5	0	3	20	12	8	15
6	Trusted By Millions	8	3	3	2	14	11	3	12
7	Claymore Athletic FC	8	4	0	4	20	19	1	12
8	Athletico Phoenix	8	4	0	4	13	17	-4	12
9	Final Fantasy XI	8	3	2	3	15	14	1	11
10	Mega Buck Bandits	8	3	2	3	12	12	0	11
11	FCK2	8	3	1	4	13	15	-2	10
12	Cheese Makers	8	3	1	4	12	19	-7	10
13	Nil Satis Nisi Optimum	8	3	0	5	13	18	-5	9
14	YTFIB	8	1	2	5	6	14	-8	5
15	Fred West Landscape Gardening XI	8	1	2	5	12	21	-9	5
16	The Dead Parrots	8	0	3	5	4	13	-9	3

Four of the top five won this week but the Aardvarks managed to extend their lead. Ady's team fell behind to a David Silva goal on 20 minutes but turned it round to beat Fred 5-1. Fred's lead only lasted five minutes before Matija Nastasic equalised via a deflection. The Aardvarks' defence did the rest - Phil Jagielka, Winston Reid, Nastasic and Nacho Monreal all picking up cleans. Last week's second place team, the Muppets, dropped back after drawing with Trusted. Beef edged ahead just before half-time, Jay Rodriguez with a downward header that ended up looping in. Ryan found his equaiiser with a clean, debutant Martin DeMichelis doing the business for the Muppets.

That result means that the reigning champion CFJs are up to second. Chris' team were unconvincing though and needed a lucky ricochet own goal from Bradley Johnson to get the win over YTFIB. The Artisans are now third and were more ruthless against Cheese Makers. Ben took this one 4-0. The game started in bizarre fashion with 'keeper Asmir Begovic belting a clearance 90-odd yards into the Cheese net after 13 seconds. Alvaro Negredo doubled the lead before the break and Loic Remy added a third in the last minute. A Leighton Baines clean completed Matthew's misery.

San Dimas edged Nil Satis in the PCMT last week and my team overcame Paul's again this. Aaron Ramsey slammed home yet another goal for Nil Satis on the hour but my defence have been a tough nut this season and I had cleans from Rafael, Kyle Walker, Maynor Figueroa and Dejan Lovren to get me home. Claymore turned in another fine performance to see off the Final Fantasy Challenge. This one to'd and fro'd until late on. Rooney tapped in on 22 minutes, another brilliant Yaya Toure free-kick had Ceri level on the hour. Sergio Aguero put Clive back in front, Gareth McAuley levelled. Claymore eventually got the upper hand with cleans from Gael Clichy, Jonas Olsson, and Kevin Theophile-Catherine.

This week must be FCK2's worse since Kevin joined the league. Following on from the Cup beating his side went down 5-1 at the Phoenix. Two goals in two minutes from Santi Cazorla and Robin van Persie had Brian ahead early on, Steven Caulker pulled FCK2 back into it but Brian had cleans from Pablo Zabaleta, Jan Vertonghen and Per Mertersacker to make it secure. Dean's still looking for his first win in the league and needed a Mathieu Debuchy clean to grab a point after Antonia Valencia's early strike looked to have given Mega Bucks the win.